Two weeks ago, I talked about all the smart stuff my two-year-old says and asked you to submit the smart things your kids have said for the chance to win a $250 Target Gift Card and a stash of very Smart Cookies from Bitsy’s Brainfood.

Your responses were awesome examples of something I call “Little Kid Logic,” which is always surprisingly smart and impossible to argue.

Here are my favorite deep thoughts and wise words spouted from the mouths of toddlers, preschoolers, and kindergarteners (including a couple new ones from own kids).

1) Harlow on birth

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2) Landon on his future:

MOM: What do you want to be when you grow up?

LANDON: I still want to be Landon.

3) Alison on Magic

ALISON: Can I have some crackers?

MOM: What’s the magic word?

ALISON: Abracadabra.

4) Jack (6yo) and Belle (4yo) on pet ownership

JACK: I’m saving up to buy a dog.

MOM: It’s not just about having money. Right now, Mom and Dad have told you that you may not have a dog.

BELLE: But when Mom and Dad get old and die…. THEN we can get a dog.

5) Ollie on weight control

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6) Mason on milking a cold

MOM: Grandma is going to the store to buy you medicine. Is there anything else you want her to bring you?

MASON: Yeah! A bouncy house!

MOM: Um, she’s just going to the grocery store. They don’t have bouncy houses there.

MASON: Oh… Then nothing.

7) Addison on saving room for dessert

ADDISON: I’m full.

MOM: Okay, then no dessert.

ADDISON: My food stomach is full, but my dessert stomach is still hungry.

8) Mazzy on the value of paper

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9) Morgan on self-identity

MOM: You are so silly.

MORGAN: I not silly. I Morgan.

10) Jackson on geography

JACKSON: Where is my mommy?

YAYA: She’s in Miami.

JACKSON: Where is your ami?

11) This kid on football

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12) Lucille on out-smarting bedtime

DAD: You need to go to your bed.


DAD: Because happy people sleep in their own beds.

LUCILLE: Where do sad people sleep?

13) Morgan on heating up Toaster Strudel

MOM: Does Daddy put this in the microwave or toaster to warm it up?

MORGAN: Well, it says TOASTER strudel, Mom, sooooo…

14) Emma on being benched

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15) Caitie on her grandmothers (aka Nanna and Gigi)

MOM: Caitie, do you want a PB&J for lunch?

CAITIE: Yeah, Momma.

MOM: And a banana?


16) Ollie on bad behavior

MOM: See how nicely behaved those kids are over there?

OLLIE: They’re THEM, I’m ME.

17) Max and Lily on survival

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18) Valerie on knowing your right from your left

MOM: You put your shoes on the wrong feet.

VALERIE: But these are the only feet I have!

19) Boy and Girl twins on gender

BOY: I am a boy because I have a penis.

MOM: That’s right. Now, what do you have that makes you a girl?

GIRL: Shoes!

20) Mary on cupcakes

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21) Carolyn on temporary tattoos

DAD: What does your tattoo say?

CAROLYN: Dad! Tattoos can’t talk!

22) Emery on Baking Bread

MOM: This dough needs to sit for 30 minutes.

(after 30 minutes)

MOM: Okay, it’s been 30 minutes. The dough is ready to come out.

EMERY: Do you think he learned his lesson?

23) This kid on nap time

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24) Camilla on God taking her dog Cricket

MOM: I wanted to tell you that Cricket died today. God came and took her to Heaven. Mommy is very sad but Cricket is in a better place.

CAMILLA: Is she in heaven now with great-grandma?

MOM: Yes.

CAMILLA: What does God look like mommy?

MOM: Well love, I am not sure. This is one of the mysteries of life.

CAMILLA: You mean you let him come in here and take our dog and you didn’t even look at his face?!?!

And the winner is…


MATTEO: I hope Daddy doesn’t use Google to find it!”

Congratulations, Matteo! You win a $250 Target Gift Card and a selection of products from Bitsy’s Brainfood!

Please contact to claim your prize.


Bitsy’s Brainfood was started by two moms who believe learning to eat smart should be lots of fun for kids. Not only are their cookies shaped like the letters of the alphabet, they come in flavors like Zuchinni Gingerbread Carrot, Orange Chocolate Beet and Sweet Potato Oatmeal Raisin. They don’t believe in hiding their vegetable ingredients in the small print— they want kids to know their veggies, value their nutrients and be excited to eat them.

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All Bitsy’s Brainfood products are organic, nut-free, whole grain and vitamin-packed. You can find them in the cookie aisle at Target. In addition to the regular bag, they also come in a pack of 16 single serve bags perfect for a healthy nut-free Halloween alternative.

If you don’t trust my endorsement, trust Harlow. Since we tried them for the first time a few weeks ago, she requests them almost daily and I love that I feel good about handing them over.

FYI, Zucchini Carrot Gingerbread are her personal favorite.


This post was sponsored by Bitsy’s Brainfood, but all thoughts and opinions are my own.