Baby Harlow has been on this earth for 18 days now. Not counting that all-inclusive vacation she spent in my uterus (I hear the drinks are free, you can sleep all day and the temperature is fantastic).
In that short amount of time, I have gotten to know her pretty well. Especially since we are in week three of NEWBORN LOCKDOWN.
A word about NEWBORN LOCKDOWN: Does everybody do this? I wanted to take Mazzy to a birthday party yesterday with Harlow in a sling and my husband showed me an article on the internet that basically said— "what stupid person would take a newborn in public especially to a germ-infested event like a toddler's birthday party????" I stayed home. DAMN YOU, INTERNET!
Anyway, I have no idea who Harlow will grow up to be. But these are the nine things I know to be true about my baby thus far…
1) She is here on a mission. A mission to destroy all the cereal in our home.
Every time I pour myself a bowl of cereal, Harlow starts crying. It would be fine if the cereal was dry, but Harlow waits for me to pour the milk and then plans her display of dissatisfaction for the exact moment when the milk pour makes the cereal rise— the rise that lets you know your bowl is prepped and ready for eating. Do you know what happens when you tend to a crying baby at this crucial moment in CEREAL TIME? Your precious flakes/puffs/clusters die a terrible drowning death and you are better off tossing it all in the trash than trying to stomach that soggy disaster.
2) Someone took a bite out of her right ear.
I don't know who did it but it definitely happened while she was on the inside. Was there a Mike Tyson shaped sperm that got pissed when Harlow made it to the egg first? Is this what they mean by a "hostile uterus"? In any case, the bite looks permanent. But… if you're going to have a lifelong defect, a small bite out of your ear is a pretty damn cute one.
3) She's an over-acheiver.
Girl dropped her umbilical cord in five days. If that doesn't say "ADVANCED", I don't know what does. I bet that's a question on preschool admissions applications. And everyone knows where you go to preschool determines where you go to college…
4) She's secretly laughing at me.
Every time Harlow spits-up, she makes sure to avoid the burp cloth and aim directly for my hair and cleavage. She either knows we're running low on laundry detergent, or… SHE'S GOT A CRUEL SENSE OF HUMOR. Next time she does it, I'm gonna see if I can catch her laughing while I try unsuccessfully to wipe regurgitated milk out of my hair with a wet paper towel. Pretty sure this is how babies entertain themselves.
5) She might be a vampire.
The girl sleeps all day and loves to stay up all night. Plus, she freaks out every time she passes directly under the hall light. Her eyes squinch up, her face turns angry red and she winces like Bill Compton caught in the sun. Maybe that's who bit her ear off?
6) She is THE COUNT reincarnated.
Harlow doesn't have a loud peircing cry. It's kind of low and back in the throat. When she gets really upset, her cry stops and starts abruptly, almost like an evil laugh. The first time I heard it, I stopped mid-diaper change and racked my brain for the soundalike. Donald Sutherland? Jeremy Irons? No… Finally, it came to me. THE COUNT!!!! Yep, my beautiful baby sounds like the number-obsessed muppet from Sesame Street. So… if you were wondering what happened to the soul of Jerry Nelson (the voice of The Count who passed away earlier this year), he just had a bath, sucked on my boob and is doing just fine.
Harlow either does not like to be swaddled or she enjoys the challenge of getting out of one. Muslin, SwaddleMe, Miracle blankets… so far, my daughter has not been presented with a swaddle she cannot beat. Next step is fastening a chain with a padlock around her arms and selling tickets.
8) She's a budding fashionista.
I went to a wedding once where the bride changed her outfit seven times. Yes, SEVEN TIMES. Similarly, Harlow likes to wear every item in her wardrobe every single day. Just to make this preference super clear, she spits up, poops or pees on whatever she's wearing when she is ready to move on to the next assemble.
9) She's adorable.
Adorable in an old-man-constantly-grunting-like-he's-got-severe-constipation kind of way. But adorable all the same.
My sister has a master’s degree in immunology, so she drilled into me the vulnerability of those first two months. It isn’t that being exposed to germs and illnesses is bad for the immune system (far from it), it’s just that things that are harmless for older children can be deadly for little ones with immature immune systems. Especially with so many these days refusing to vaccinate: the very young are at more of a risk than ever. I think you did the right thing. My sister knows someone whose baby got severely ill because someone came to the bris exposed to meningitis 🙁
*descends from soapbox*
At least it isn’t bitter cold like when Mazzy/Rebecca was born! I remember going crazy because I couldn’t even go outside….
I took Kiki out on a tram in Amsterdam (and shopping) when she was 6 days old. Kyle came to our anniversary lunch at Olive Garden when he was 5 days old. What can I say, us Europeans do it different.
And Kyle had the same ability to cry the second I sat down to eat anything. It was like he could sense it or something.
Our second baby is now five months old, and I honestly couldnt remember when we first started taking her out and about. So I went to the pictures to confer. Looks like we started within the first week. We share a home with another family (who also has a toddler). Seclusion was never an attractive or practical option.
SHE IS ADORABLE!
and you’re doing the right thing staying in, I mean, it’s winter! Cold and flu bugs are everywhere and you don’t want your little bebe getting croup or something. If you can stay home, stay home. You wont regret it. When I was in lock down I watched every episode of 30 rock. Then I went around in a newborn stupor screaming, “TREAT EVERY WEEK LIKE IT”S SHARK WEEK!”
Kept me sane
4 weeks or so. we went to a baby shower. and then shopping because it was freaking cold that winter and outside was out of the question. Lots of time at BJs. She had her first overnight away at 6 weeks with my parents. Yay grandparents!
My son was at work with me the day after he got out of the hospital. He has been exposed to everything and knock on wood has only been sick twice in this almost 3 years. 1 24 hour stomach bug and 1 fever for half a day. So I say bring on the germs build up that immune system. Well he has had 3 ear infections but he never slowed down for them and you can’t catch an ear infection.
My second daughter Kieli has the “bite out of the ear” thing going on too. At first it freaked me out, but now at age 8, it’s just part of her awesomeness. Harlow is an absolute doll.
She almost makes me want another baby.
Almost. As in – not really but damn is she freakin’ cute.
My thoughts exactly! She is beautiful, Ilana!
First, Gorgeous baby Harlow!!! Second, my daughter absolutely refused to be swaddled. My mom came to visit and I told her this. She told me I was “doing it wrong”. So I told her to do it and I’d go to Target. She smugly said “Fine!”
When I got back from Target the first words out of my mother’s mouth were “That child is fucking Houdini!” Some kids just HATE the swaddle. Jess slept in her swing for 5 months!
Sooo adorable! And whoa about that ear! Bet once her cartilage settles in, she’ll have a full ear again 🙂
Harlow is SO BEAUTIFUL! And your description of her made me laugh, because it reminds me of Lydia from Rants from Mommyland and her daughter “Mini Me,” the one who is the “old soul”, who acts like an old lady trapped in a 4 year old’s body. I have a feeling Harlow may be your Mini-Me.
Also, (since I have no babies to compare to yet except stories about me) I apparently kept wiggling one of my feet out of the swaddle in the hospital nursery, to the bewilderment of the nurses. According to my parents, the nurses kept saying, “She’s not supposed to be able to do that!” I guess I didn’t like the swaddle either. Too funny about Harlow!
Try this for the swaddle –
http://www.thewoombie.com/
Seriously my baby LOVED it and there is really no way of escape. The zebra print is SO CUTE!
Evan, who is now 11 months (whoa!) HATED to be swaddled from day 1.
I remember Lil’ Bit went through a phase where she sounded like The Count. I can’t remember whether it was her laugh or cry, but the first time I heard it I did the same thing as you – I stopped what I was doing, tried to figure out why it sounded so familiar, and then told my husband, “She sounds like The Count!”
Disagree. Well, I agree with the immature immune system to a degree, but that is where breastfeeding kicks up it’s advantage in that baby is now not only swimming in the antibodies provided during pregnancy by good ol’ mom, but also all the lovely ones colostrum and breastmilk provide.
Also: (1)if there is anything germier than a hospital (pretty much only place C dif can be found) or doctor’s office (especially nowadays when filled with sick people) I have yet to find it – yet that is where we do take newborns on a regular basis so pretty sure they can handle a stroll around a mall
(2)it is a lot easier to keep newborns contained and away from things as you can keep them in a sling/your arms/covered up carseat etc. and gently decline letting others hold them … it’s when they turn a few months old and start moving/touching things then sticking their hands in their mouth/sticking anything they can grab in their mouths that their immune systems are put to the test.
(3) Moms can get at the very least stircrazy, at more extreme level PPD, from being kept isolated. So if it makes you happy to stay home go for it, but if it is starting to make you tear up to think of yet another day cooped up, may be best to bundle up and head out
And to take it a step further, what would you do if it was your fourth or fifth kid? Get rid of the other kids for 2 months, or shrug when your snotty nosed 4 year old who goes to school where they are exposed to goodness knows how many germs on a regular basis (so is basically a walking germ-ball) sticks their hand in the newborns mouth because they are “helping feed him Mommy”.
Perspective – what is cringe-worthy with the first or second becomes shrug-worthy by the third and beyond 😉
Try the Mom’s on call swaddle method… You need big recieving blanket 40×40 though… Was the only one my daughter would stay in and I love it! You can you tube search for video!
I did not do the Newborn Lockdown. We had very few clothes that fit my long skinny boy so we went shopping at 4 days. I didn’t have many places to go but if there was something we went. I find babies very portable. He usually slept the whole time anyway.
My baby just turned a year. I had family with kiddos come visit when Luke was 3 days old, then we hosted a party the following week. He joined me at work (a preschool) when he was just 2 weeks old. He’s had 2 minor colds in his life; one when his daddy came home from a trip to Europe and one when we moved to another state. Some kids are just more prone to illness than others. Breastfeeding Harlow is the best thing to combat those germs! And if you’re still nervous, keeping her in a sling (like you had planned) is an excellent way to keep other peoples’ hands off her.
Adorable is just not a strong enough word for her. She is much more than adorable – – and she has just about the biggest, most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. 🙂
my 3wo can escape any swaddle too!!
Next time you have cereal, pour your milk into a separate glass, put them both in your Designated Nursing Location, and then wait about 10 minutes or so for your newborn to want a boob. While she’s distracted with her breakfast, you add the milk and enjoy perfect cereal. I hope she’s not the type that always wants to put her feet up and thinks arms are totally footrests. I haven’t used a lidless cup in nearly 3 years.
My 2 month old is also an escape artist. We tried the Wombie on him, and it works! http://www.thewoombie.com/
I feel like someone can come up with a better name for it, though…
Our 1st would NEVER be swaddled. Every time we tried, she would kick her feet until they were free and then calm down. It was like she was just soo happy to be FREE from that cramped uterus where she had tied her umbilical cord in a true knot before she got too big to do acrobatics. She’s still a girl on the move.
Oh yes, and I too was jealous of a friend who had 3 custom gowns for her wedding!
I had an ex-boyfriend who had the same “bite” out of his ear. His mom told him the cutest story about it – she told him that it was the place where the angels were holding onto him before he was born and that he was so cute & sweet they didn’t want to let go, so it left a mark when he was finally born. I think it’s an adorable story to tell – feel free to make it your own!
She’s beautiful! Both my boys were breaking out of their swaddles around the 2-week mark.
Harlow is ADORABLE!! The Miracle Blanket was the only thing that worked for us…
As for staying away from a toddler infested party during cold and flu season… I’m with Mike. RSV may seem like a simple cold to everyone else, but can potentially be dangerous for a newborn. I hibernated with my little one during the cold and flu season. Don’t get me wrong, we went out, but not to an enclosed birthday party with germ infested toddlers running amuck.
We used the Halo Swaddle blanket and it was a God-send. I wish I would have had one with my firstborn who was a little Houdini herself. My little guy *never* got out of that Halo swaddle. Although he admittedly wasn’t very concerned about doing so. Good luck with your little magician!
Look at that sweet face! Oh what a precious little thing! And she’s a vampire that sounds like the count! What more could you ask for?
She is so adorable!
Not to be redundant but she is really adorable!
And I went out and about with my newborn on day 3. . . .course I live in CA and not wintery NY.
And lastly, I have an ear notch. I think it is awesome (especially if her kids have it (my father has the same thing).
and double lastly, this makes me want another!
For what it’s worth, I don’t think one has to avoid leaving the house completely, but I think it’s a good idea to avoid crowded public places like malls/parties/etc. I see it kind of like when my parents’ generation says “I used to sit in the passenger seat of the car than I was 5 years old without a seatbelt and I came out just fine”. Yes, it might work out just fine, but breast milk can’t protect against some of the scarier stuff out there that strangers can be carrying around. I was fine with visiting certain people’s houses, going outside when it wasn’t bitterly cold, etc, I just wasn’t going to a toddler party if you paid me 🙂
I’m actually far from a germophobe, I just didn’t want to take that risk in the first few months. I heard too many stories of people who weren’t so lucky.
She is so adorable. Congrats again hon..and yes baby lockdown is a dreamy time.
She’s very mature for her age and she looks rather serious. Loved the photos. My daughter, too, busted out of every swaddling blanket. I figure – hey, they finally made it out – they don’t want to be held down.
Don’t worry about the swaddling. My oldest is about to turn thirty and was never swaddled. He slept on his stomach and I often found him nose down. She’s fine just put her in a blanket sleeper and she’ll be good.
I have a bite out of my ear and it’s one of my favourite things, just because no one else has one. Fingers crossed she’ll grow up to think the same 🙂
I don’t want to start any arguments on here, but one thing I have seen help newborns are–no joke–chiropractic adjustments. If you can find one that specializes in babies and young children you may get some relief–some babies sleep better and their digestion improves–seen it happen first-hand. Too bad I didn’t know about it when my little ones were newborns!! And don’t worry–they don’t crank your babies the same way they may with adults–they do mini finger-pressure adjustments that look like they’re checking for ripeness on a tomato! Crazy but can work!!!
My daughter is a Jr Houdini as well. she managed to pull her arms out her shirt and stick them out the collar the day she was born.