If you are joining the Glare-Off for the first time, I'd suggest you start with ROUND #1. For everyone else, welcome to THE FINALS

Yesterday, Liam and Sidney gave it their all, but in the end, they just couldn't beat the terrifying glares of Kadence and Lil D. But, since they made it so far into the tournament, they will not go home empty-handed…

As a consolation prize, Liam and Sidney will both get a Mommy Shorts Mug of their choosing. Wasn't the campaigning and the heartache all worth it??


If anybody else would like to join my mother in purchasing Mommy Shorts paraphernalia, you can do so here. 

Now on to the main event. (If you scare easily, DO NOT READ ON. These two little ladies will haunt you in your sleep.)


Which baby is more likely to fashion a shiv out of Lego?

Which baby has her own evil theme music?

Which baby sets a place at the dinner table for her imaginary friend, "Lucifer"?

Which baby inspired a Law and Order episode?

Which baby makes Dick Cheney pee his pants?

Which baby enjoys a nice side of fava beans with her meal?

Which baby took out Caillou in his sleep?

Which baby is hoarding eggs for Halloween?

Which baby hides forks in the sandbox?

Which baby sent Chucky a housewarming hatchet?

Which baby's favorite word is 'revenge'?

Which baby is most likely to get the Church Lady to say, "Hmmm…Could it be…SATAN?"

Which baby is scarier than a Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion?

Which baby scares the monsters under her bed?

Which baby wants a pickaxe for Christmas?

Which baby gives Freddy nightmares?

Which baby started a Diaper Genie fire with her eyes?

Which baby was blacklisted by the babysitting service?

Which baby is most likely to tell you "get your money and get out" after she's done breastfeeding?

Voting will continue all weekend with polls closing at 6pm EST Sunday night. Winner will be announced Monday. (UPDATE: Voting has closed and results have been hidden. Winner will be revealed tomorrow, October 22nd.)

May the evilest baby win!


Today's giveaway is a $250 gift card* to North American Bear Company, which literally sells hundreds of bears, dolls and plushies on their site, including some of my favorites pictured below:


$250 should cover multiple children through Christmas. Unless you've got an evil baby who threatens to change your gmail password, if you don't spend it all on him at once. If your kid would prefer a plushie version of Ted Bundy over a yellow chick or a pink mouse, perhaps you can interest him in this Monster named Yucky

Also, it's time to get your child professional help.


1) You must be a Mommy Shorts Facebook Fan to enter. If you are not one already, you can become one by clicking here.

2) Answer the following question in the comment section below: What should I do for my next photo contest? 

All giveaway winners will be announced on Monday October 22nd, along with the winner of the glare-off. You can still enter each giveaway up through Sunday by clicking the links below and commenting under the respective post. They are:

"I Pretzel NY" onesie, mini Wayfarers and toddler fedora from Piccolini ($78)

Set of BB Blocks ($40)

3 Princess Sets or Halloween Costumes from Just Pretend Kids (prices vary)

Beatrix NY Wheelie Bag ($94)



* $250 includes all available items except Make Your Own Monster