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Along with Mazzy's new favorite phrase, she's also got a new favorite pastime. It's called "SITTING". Have you heard of it?

Every time she sees the opportunity to back herself into a chair, Mazzy seizes it with unmatched enthusiasm. Benches, couches, dining room chairs— all are met with screams of "SIT!!!!!!!!!! SIT!!!!!!!!!! SIT!!!!!!!!!!!!" while flailing her legs and scrambling upward. Most of the time, I have to help her get situated correctly. But once seated, she settles in smugly like she just purchased a one-way ticket to "Adult Land" on sale.

Last week, Mazzy encountered her first kid-sized table and chair set at a friend's house. She was beside herself with excitement. So much so that she miscalculated the distance from her butt to the chair, overturned the whole thing, smacked her head against the wall and ended up sandwiched between the wall and the table upside down. (Can I get a big hand for my superior supervising?)

Once she got the hang of it, she was beyond pleased. So now, of course, I have to buy her a set. (YAY! More stuff!)

As many of you know, I live in a NYC apartment so the new kids' table and chair set is not going to live in some playroom at the far end of the house only to be seen by other toddlers and perhaps a parent who stumbles drunkenly into the wrong room. The set will be going in my living room which is also my dining room, my office, my foyer (ha!) and my kitchen.

This means— I want a kids' table and chair set that matches the modern style of my apartment.

But how much am I willing to pay for such a thing?

The only way to know for sure is to do another "Big Ticket, Little Ticket". That's where I find the most obscenely expensive version of an item and then work my way down. In other words— am I raising a Bravo's "Million Dollar Decorator" kind of kid or is Mazzy more HGTV's "Design on a Dime"?

All items are first and foremost well-designed. So the "Littlest Ticket" might not be dirt cheap but it's the cheapest I found while still offering something special.

Shall we?

After much research, I found the only kids' table and chair set worthy of the "Big Ticket". It wasn't even close. That honor goes to Knoll Kids.

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One Child's Bertoia Diamond Chair will set you back $586. Pair it with a Cyclone Side table (as is recommended) and you can add an additional $1162. If you decide that you'd like your kid to have a friend, that'll bring the grand total to $2334. But kids thrive in solitude, right? And the superior sense of design he'll develop will be totally worth it, don't you think? You'll be so proud when he asks for an $899 mini-replica of an Eames leather lounge chair for his 3rd birthday and throws a tantrum over a Jonathan Adler table lamp!

No?

Okay. Then how 'bout this  Cygnet and Little Bert replica from Little Nest?

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It's only $475 and they even throw in the second chair for FREE!

But the replica isn't getting my "Middle Ticket". I was just showing off my google search skills. That honor is going to P'kolino Little One's Table and Chairs.

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P'Kolino's adorably orange wood veneer table set will cost you the very middling price of $125. And after the Bertoia craziness, that practically sounds like you bought it off one of those guys selling used books and old flatware on a blanket on the side of the street!

Still not cheap enough for you? Alright then. Let's try the "Little Ticket"— the Kids' Table & Chair Set from Tot Tutors.

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The plastic sherbert colored set will still uphold your mod decor aesthetic while barely impacting your wallet at the paltry price of $59. You probably have $59 in change floating at the bottom of your bag! Also, the Tot Tutors set comes with four, count them— FOUR chairs! That's THREE whole friends for your little one.

Don't bother inviting over the Bertoia kid though. He's too busy riding on his Vespa rocker and playing house with an $800 doll pram.

And your kid can't play at his house either.

He's only got one chair.