On Tuesday, I wrote a tough post about Mazzy acting out on a shopping trip and I want to thank you all so much for your sympathetic and helpful responses. (Above is Mazzy in happier times, aka the times I buy her love with ice cream and sprinkles.)
I actually didn't post yesterday because I wanted to take the time to make sure I responded to all your comments, but instead I answered three and fell asleep on my couch with my computer in my lap.
As many of you know, the only reason I am able to hold a full-time job, be a mom and write a blog is because typically, I do not require much sleep.
Well, that appears to be changing.
These last couple of weeks, I have been EXHAUSTED. Which (f you've noticed) is why I've barely written for Babble this month.
I needed a bit of a break.
Or a good night's sleep.
One or the other.
Or both.
Both would be WONDERFUL.
The first comment under Tuesday's post alluded to me seemingly having it all together.
Let me be clear:
I DO NOT HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER.
I like to find humor in things because without humor, life sucks. How do you think I got through my parents divorce at ten? DUH.
Obviously, there is TONS of humor to be found in parenting. Because a lot of it sucks. A lot of is awesome too (although perhaps a slightly smaller portion).
I don't write about every bad moment because I want Mommy Shorts to be more entertaining than upsetting but sometimes, it feels dishonest to be flippant about something that was really really hard.
My friend, Jill Smokler (aka Scary Mommy) says all this so much better.
She sent me a copy of her new book Confessions of a Scary Mommy
I ACTUALLY READ IT.
Let me emphasize how much ACTUALLY READING IT means.
I don't think I've read anything longer than a Dr. Seuss book since Mazzy was born.
Don't judge me. Have you read The Lorax lately? I defy you to get through it without thinking, "OH MY GOD— JUST CHOP DOWN THE FUCKING TREES AND LET ME PUT MY CHILD TO BED ALREADY!!!!"
On the contrary, Confessions of a Scary Mommy reads effortlessly as it weaves Jill's story with online parenting confessions that she collects from her readers.
The confessions run the gamut from harmless to horrifying, humorous to heart-wrenching, but all make you feel less alone in "NOT HAVING IT ALL TOGETHER".
Here are a few I pulled directly from the book:
"I joined a gym for the free day care. I drop the kids off and read magazines and blogs in the locker room."
"My son taught the term 'motherfucker' to his whole preschool class. He learned it from hearing me refer to his brother-in-law as such. Whoops."
"I cheat at board games to make them end faster."
And my personal favorite:
"Once a woman asked me if I planned to breast-feed my baby, so I asked her whether she shaved her vagina. Oh, I'm sorry, you don't like personal, none-of-your-business questions?"
Jill told me at her book party that she thinks it's important for her children to know she's not perfect.
I love that.
I'm imperfect for the good of my children!
There's a parenting philosophy I can really embrace.
Today, I'm giving away a signed hardcover copy of Jill's new book. All you have to do is confess something "Scary-Mommy-Style" in the comment section below.
Here's mine:
Usually, whenever I work late, I do everything possible to get home before Mazzy's bedtime. But last night I was totally spent and I swear, my heart sank when I opened the door and discovered Mazzy was still up and about.
Terrible, right?
Your turn!
Feel free to leave your comment anonymously or under a fake name— just make sure to include your email (I'm the only one who can see it), in case you win the book. Winner will be announced next Friday.
Oh- And congrats to Ninja Mom who won second place in the Easter Sunday caption contest. The first place winner says he's been shooting blanks since 2002, so he'd like to pass Le Petite Box (a gift for pregnant women and new moms) on to her.
Although, with four kids, maybe Ninja Mom would like to confess a desire to get her tubes tied too?
Have an excellent weekend!
— Mommy Shorts
I need massive amounts of sleep for an adult.
When that crucial 2pm siesta time rolls around, I look at my kid and say, “Gee, you must need a nap.”
It does not matter if she looks tired. It’s self-preservation and has worked. Thank God she goes along with it.
Motherhood is freaking hard. Sometimes, there seem to be more difficult days than sunshiny days. Having said that, I do love being a mom. I do love all the moments. I love being able to write about the good and not so good stuff.
My Scary Mommy moment? Wednesday was a REALLY hard day. So I put the toddler down for his bedtime 15 minutes earlier AND cut the bedtime routine time by half. I just wanted my time desperately.
I wake up at 4am every day to go to work so when I get home at 11:30am I have basically forced myself to like “yo gabba gabba” so that I can lay on the couch for an hour when I get home from work and then my 1 1/2 year old goes down for a nap right after so MOMMY can nap!! I always feel guilty plopping her in front of the TV, but hey it’s better than unnecessary lash outs.
I leave my son at daycare for an hour longer a day while i work out/cook dinner/shop after i get off from work. He can play just as well there as he can at home, right?
On the weekends I move bedtime up an HOUR because by the end of the day after spending the WHOLE day (vs the 4 hours i usually get to see her on weekdays) with Bugs, I am so exhausted I can barely stand up. I have no idea how our sitter does it! And I feel awful, like I should be sucking up all the time I can because I don’t see her that much during the week. I hate mom guilt.
I loathe bath time, so I use my son’s eczema as an excuse to keep his baths/showers to no more than every three days. I mean, his doctor TOLD me to do that, so it’s okay, right??
I have had so many of those moments/confessions, not sure where I would start?
How about:
My kids went to bed at 8 for years because I needed them to be there for me, not them.
We would put them to bed and immediately go have the ice cream we didn’t want to share with the little br..darlings.
I pretended not to hear them at night so I didn’t have to get up. Don’t tell my husband.
I told everyone my kids learned to sleep through the night in self defense…no one loved waking me up at night. Yikes. Bad mamma. There were growls and mean talk in my head when I had to get up with them. Also no lights and no talking at all.
My 2 year old daughter would get up and roam the house when we were sleeping so we put a hook and eye on her door so she couldn’t get out when we didn’t know it. It was either that or let her get into scary stuff unsupervised. Don’t tell CPS.
To get an extra hour in the morning when she was 11 months and would wake up at 6, I would go throw her bottle in her bed and go back to bed. She would drink it and go back to sleep too.
Enough? Ok. LOL. Don’t judge me. My kids turned out great. 😀
We’re human and so-o-o not perfect!!
The other night I took care of all the vomited-on bedding because it was more appealing than consoling a sick and crying baby. Thank God for my husband.
I’m ditching my 2 year old all next week to go on vacation and get hammered with my friends.
Since you are so exhausted, is there any chance you are pregnant again? Just wondering……….
I already have Jill’s amazing book so I’m just here commenting with some love and support for you. xoxo
My son is the most regular baby on the planet. You would think he was 80 years old and eating metamucil by the spoon full. He usually goes #2 5 minutes before we are headed out the door. So, I take him to day care and let them deal with it. It’s max 10 minutes of dirty diaper and he doen’t seem to mind and diaper rash doesn’t seem to be an issue. I figure that’s why I’m giving them 1/2 my salary right?
I can’t believe i wrote this…. the guilt from this is overwhelming!
Sometimes I think the only reason I’m dating is so I have someone else to help me with my almost-3-year-old son.
We told the daycare to keep naps at a minimum which means our daughter goes to bed earlier and doesn’t try to coax us to stay up as much. On bad week-end days, we’ve been known to put her to sleep at 6ish to preserve our sanity.
Last night I suggested that I make the kids a tent in the living room because I couldn’t stand to play another game of Trouble and wanted to lay on the couch with a magazine.
I was a SAHM for about a year and half after my youngest was born. I went back to work in August as a long-term sub for the fall semester. I’ve been at home again since January and I CAN’T WAIT to go back to work. I love my kids but I hate staying home. I miss adult interaction and I feel like my brain is turning to moosh.
My husband does a lot of the work caring for our daughter because I have back problems. I milk it and let him do more than I really need him to just so I don’t have to deal with her as much.
When Monkey gets a cold, instead of feeling sorry for her, I get annoyed that I might have to skip work and probably be up at night a few times.
We are pretending that my daughter’s third birthday is happening a week earlier than it actually is, so that I can go to a beer festival with my cousin, while my husband stays at home with my daughter. My reasoning? I need to go to make sure that I learn more about beer (I have a beer blog). Secretly I am looking forward to drinking all weekend with my cousin who I haven’t partied with in almost 8 years. I think that is the worst parenting thing ever… I feel so guilty. But she doesn’t know how to read a calendar yet, right?
Kim R. – Seriously, that’s me. I was a SAHM for the first year of my son’s life then I went to work. I got pg and went on maternity leave right after his third B-Day. I’ve been home since January and I’m counting down the days (9 to go!) before I go back to work. I’ve even been taking him to daycare just so I can have some time without him in my face whining about everything.
Other stuff: I put both the kids down for naps even though it’s early for their nap time just so I have a couple minutes to eat something I want or to dye my hair. I’ll also make up errands to run just so I can leave both kids with hubby and have some alone time in my car. Running to the store to get tampons I don’t need has never been so nice!
On bad days I have been known to go to the gym just so I could get a hot shower and time to read a book or write a post.
If my daughter says she is “all done” before mommy is all done with whatever l leave her in the high hair. If I have things to do and don’t want “help” I will drag her around the house in the high chair. I too have left the poo diapers for daycare. She is young and goes to bed pretty early already so that is my saving grace.
I am a single mom… On the weekends, when I want so desperately to sleep in, I will get up with my 3 year old son, get him something to eat, turn a movie on, and go back to sleep for the hour/hour and a half while he watches the movie. I’ve done it so often, he now expects it… “Mommy go back to sleep?”
My mom was babysitting my children while I was at school. My class goes late into the evening. But sometimes, even though class gets out early I will sit in my car and read for an hour so that the kids will be asleep when I get home.
I claim to be going to the bathroom, when really I am hiding in my room, playing Angry Birds.
I have a meeting that is an hour long on one Monday a month—yet every-time it stretches past bedtime. Leaving DH with bedtime routines, not so bad you say until the day I pulled in the driveway and saw through the bay window EVERYONE still playing in the living room–Yeah Daddy too. I grabbed my cell and sat in the driveway “talking” til Daddy noticed and quickly shuffled everyone off to bed. It was about 1/2 hour after they all were abed when I finally “hung up the phone”
Okay don’t judge…we live in the middle of no where and have a fence to protect him from roaming too far with that said when I have had enough of my 2 year old I send him outside by himself and tell the dog to watch him…the dog and cat never leave his side when he is out there. I close and yes lock the door and even when he comes back knocking I pretend I dont hear him sometimes. Its either that or us both go insane. Sometimes it can be for up to 30mins or longer before I finally go looking for him….better than me loosing it and yelling or spanking him though right??? Yes I know its wrong!
Oh and just to clarify he loves being outside and plays the whole time its not like he is crying trying to get back in.
My kids have thousands of dollars worth of clothes and I am always buying them more..because when I was their age when everyone was wearing Adidas sneakers I was wearing the Payless version that had the name similar to Adidas and only 2 stripes….
After one especially rough parenting day,y three year old was doing his very stubborn technique of pretending to not hear a single request I made towards him. After a few minutes I repeatedly asking for him to clean up his room, I turned to him and yelled ‘oh my hell are you deaf????’ I think the only step below that would be asking if he was stupid, so at least I didn’t do that….right?
I would love to read this book! Bravo for you for actually reading it. Last time I read a full book was also before having our son.
I secretly eat junk food really fast in the kitchen so that my son won’t/can’t ask for any.
I’ve been so mad that I’ve almost hit my son. So shameful.
P.S. I love that we can all be honest here!!!!
My kids think I have a raging case of diarrhoea because when things get crazy, I lock myself in the toilet and read The Hunger Games. Or play tetris. Hey – I am a SAHM of three kids who alternate between being utterly delicious and bent on each other’s murder…
I take my cell phone into the bathroom with me and hide out for 15 minutes reading blogs and surfing the internet when I have really finished my “business” in 3. Sometimes I even do this when it’s dinner time and I haven’t finished making dinner, but I really need a break.
However, it is now backfiring when my autistic son – whom I have often coached from the other side of the bathroom door on pushing through his resistance to hard stools – turns the tables on me. Concluding that the reason I’m in the bathroom so long is the same one that keeps HIM in there, he stands outside the door loudly encouraging me (as I do him) to “Make a big poop, Mommy! Push! Push hard, Mommy! You can do it! Did you make your poop yet?”
Oy vey!
I love it when the neighbour kids come over because then I don’t have to play with my kids.
I get off work early on Fridays, but still pick my kindergartner up at the regular time so I can go to happy hour for an hour or two.
Yes, Totally this….
I lock the bathroom door and take the ipad or a book with me, and take as long as I want, even just to pee. I plan outings with friends so we get back AFTER the sitter or grandpa puts them to bed. I plan shopping trips on church nights so i I can drop the 9yo and shop alone (leaving the 4yo with the husband.). I’m not ashamed. Parenting is hard and children are exhausting.
All I hear from people who are working moms is that they WISH they could stay home with their kids all day. Well, as of right now, I could afford to be a SAHM if I wanted to. There would be some sacrifices, sure, but I could do it. To boot, I have not been very happy with my job lately, and I’ve considered quitting, but the thought of being home 24/7 with my daughter terrifies me a bit. I just don’t know how to be attentive and engaging to her 24/7.
I feel like a horrible human being for writing that out, I love my daughter, I swear!
My gf’s and I used to take our children to “Eco – Explorers” at the YMCA so we could go to the pub for a nice lunch.
Once, when my almost-3-year-old daughter was in her “screaming for fun” phase, she started screaming while I was driving – that super-sonic, high-pitched, ear-bleeding scream. After repeatedly asking her to stop because I had a migraine, I pulled over, turned around, and screamed at her as at the top of my lungs. Then, maturely, asked how SHE liked it. That was a year ago, and I still feel so guilty.
Most of the comments above are from people with much younger kids than I have…
So my current confession:
I constantly tune out my kids when they’re telling me stories. Like all the time. In my head, I’m thinking about what I need to get at the store or what email I need to reply to or how screwed I am that I’m supposed to bring dessert on Sunday or my personal favorite: “Dear God, make her stop talking or remove my ears.”
Unfortunately, my kids aren’t babies or toddlers anymore. And they REMEMBER what they’ve told me. They constantly catch me in a zone-out or call me out when I ask them a question at night that they already answered in a twenty-minute-long story after school.
I know I will miss the sounds of their voices when they stop talking to me; when they move out (in only a few years).
But lord. Sometimes I just want them to shut the fuck up.
I’m taking advantage of my oops-pregnant “pregnancy nose” by instantly smelling our toddler’s dirty diaper and sending him to go play with daddy. I figure I’m justified because the smell of the open diaper would just cause my morning sickness to act up, right?
I taught my 2 year old that all television that isn’t animated is called “the news.” That way if I watch the Real Housewives or something else Bravo-esque with her and she tells anyone about it, she’ll say that mommy was watching the news.
OMG – me too!!!! I fell bad but … I hate to say it but i give him some tylenol and send him to daycare. At least then I can get a few hours in at work.
I would put my daughter ( at 3,4,5 ) in a plastic storage container ( Without lid People ! ) with water and barbies and towels around the floor (as the beach ) She would be all pruned up and still would not want to get out. I didn’t care if I noticed she hadn’t visited the bathroom in awhile , She was Quiet.
On Another Note , Get Tested for LYME disease. If you are over tired with headaches ! NY is the most populated state in the U.S for Lyme and most doctors give you depression pills before they bother testing you for it.
How do I choose just one?
My biggest one: I’ve been home on maternity leave since March 26th…and yet my son continues to go to daycare. The worst part? I still sometimes dread picking him up at 3:30 and am often tempted to leave him there longer.
I am wracked with guilt over this.
Homework time… I cant do it.
When my kids are pushing me to the breaking point I start fake crying. They get so scared they stop being naughty and do whatever I say.
I sometimes hide from my toddler and smoke a cigarette on really bad day.
I send my 2 year old to daycare while I am home with my newborn.
In the beginning it was so I could “handle” just the baby. But the baby is so easy. now it’s really so I have time to myself.
I was using the computer upstairs during the baby’s nap, and I was STARVING. To get to the kitchen for a snack, I’d have to pass through the living room (where the older kids were). I didn’t want to divert their attention from the TV because then I’d have to listen to 2 hours of Pokemon play-by-play, dodge invitations to play dress-up, and probably make them a snack, too. So I hid upstairs and ate all the baby’s yogurt melts instead.
Like a lot of people here it has to do with stealing some extra peace and quiet by forcing early bedtime/naps. I am also secretly happy about finally weaning so my boobs can get a break!
OK mY SCARY MOMMY MOMENT WAS WHEN i WENT HOME AND TOTALLY LEFT ME TODDLER AT DAY CARE DID NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT TILL I PULLED IN THE DRIVEWAY AND MY HUSBAND IS LIKE DID YOU FORGET SOMETHING… tHAT WAS A FEW YEARS AGO AND MY NOW TEENAGER STILL REMINDS ME THAT HE WAS ONCE FORGOTTON AT DAYCARE…
Yesterday my husband worked late & my kids (1yr, 3yr, 5yr, & 13yr old) asked for cake for dinner. I was so tired of dealing with them while trying to cook that I said sure. Then, they asked for more. I just let them finish the giant cake so I didn’t have to listen to them complain.
When my son was about two he threw up all over the bed and as he did so I shrieked and hurled him onto the floor. My sister happened to be visiting, and to this day she still goes on about how unsympathetic I was to that poor baby. What can I say, I don’t have a lot of patience when it comes to being sick or taking care of others.
I used to tell my kid it was later than it really was so I could put him to bed early, now the bugger is learning to tell time dang it all!
– i enjoyed doing my taxes last night while my husband took my son to the park.
– i work from home and don’t have a commute so i let my son watch a cartoon from 8:00-8:30am and 5:00-5:30 pm so that i can have some into-work and out-of-work transitioning peace.
– i like visiting my mom now because she loves to take care of me and her grandson. after a few days i start to feel like my son is my baby brother or something. (makes me wonder if celebrities with chefs, nannies, personal assistants, and housekeepers get a complex like this)
I am the 1st to admit that I have a bit of a “potty” mouth, I also have a habit of yelling either “d**chebag or a$$hole” at cars that cut me off in traffic. So with that in mind I was driving one day and was cut off by a driver from a different state and before I could say anything my son in his car seat calls out from the back “you D**cheA$$”. At that moment I realized that yes I curse a little too much in front of my son, but I was also so proud of him that he created the curse word and used it at the appropriate time/situation……
My daughter always falls asleep when she’s really warm- in a snowsuit in the car, under too many blankets, wearing that extra sweatshirt, etc… So if I really need her to take that nap, I have been known to put her in the snowsuit…
My 20 month son learned to accurately identify colors over Easter weekend because of all the M&Ms he ate.
And I’m a SAHM, but I explain (preach?) to people that it’s a lot of work and I don’t get to just sit around all day eating bon bons. But right now I’m totally sitting and eating bon bons while reading this blog.
Hey now, I love winning without, um, winning. Woot! I’ll be sure to thank Mooooog.
Also, I commented on your Tuesday post! I swear. WTF is wrong with me and comments lately? I was very supportive and stuff. Really, really.
I will confess these two things. One, right now Zippy is my hands down favorite child and I frequently look at her and think (not say, duh, I’m not that keen on screwing up my kids permanently) “I wish the others were like you.” She often brushes her teeth and dresses in the morning without being asked. See also picks up her toys without complaint. I’m sure she’ll be a horrendous teenager. Can’t stay lucky forever.
My second confession is that I don’t wash my hands with soap and water after changing Roo’s pee-pee diapers. Just a squirt of hand sanitizer, usually. Meh, so don’t shake hands with me.
Brilliant.
I’ve been letting my kids watch Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.
I think that makes it clear that I’m taking this one.
I was wondering that too…
My son goes to daycare 3 days a week, whether I have him or my ex does (he doesn’t usually go when my ex has him). I tell people that I’m paying for 3 day/week anyway, and I don’t want to pull him out in case they fill his and his coming-soon sister’s spot (she will be going when I return to school).
Secretly I like being able to stay home and spend all day on the computer or “cleaning” or sleeping.
I have 18-month-old triplets and I frequently will put one in time out for hitting, then get involved with something, wonder why the kids are playing so quietly, then suddenly realize the banished one is STILL in time out. And it’s ten minutes later.
I don’t feel attractive after my most recent pregnancy and hate being naked. I let my 2 year daughter old co-sleep so that I don’t have to have sex with my husband.
I have also sent my daughter to daycare after giving her Tylenol so I could work for at least a few hours. She goes to daycare on Fridays even though I don’t normally work – most of the time I have doctor’s appointments and laundry, but sometimes I just read and watch TV because without that time alone, it’s hard for me to make it through the weekend with my crazy 20 month old. Mommy guilt is the WORST!!!
If I could pick a vacation – any dream vacation at all in the world – it would be something all by myself. No kids, no husband, not even friends. I am so behind on my Kim Time that I need a week in some retreat in the desert or the mountains or by the sea all by myself. No one to need me or ask me or touch me or expect anything of me. No one to influence me at all, no one to deal with or work around or think about. I can eat when I want, wake when I want, watch what i want, read what I want, get up and go for a walk if I want or lay on the couch in the room for hours if I want.
Just a vacation where I get to do only what I want – genuinely, Me and Only Me. Because I’m sick and tired of having to think about other people. I’ve spent the past 7 years configuring my life and wants around other people who depend on me. I need a recharge.
lol me too I thought the whole post at the end you were going to say you were pregnant. I practically just scanned the post to quickly get to the part where you said “and I’m pregnant.” lol
most people look forward to the weekends. I look forward to weekdays, Monday can’t come
soon enough because that’s when child care starts again! I seriously don’t know how SAHM’s do it.
I swear I love my children….
I am going back to school in the fall so I can escape my children. It will also force my husband to step up more at home.
I was at home alone with my toddler and wanted to go for a run. She got all excited and started putting on her running shoes, then freaked when I said she had to be in her stroller. I still insisted she not start off running beside me because I had a specific route/running goal to meet. ( so basically it was ok for me to get exercise, but not her. wtf me?) (in my defence was nap time and she passed out quickly). Used to have guilt about my Sat morning run for similar reason, I would run and feel great ( time couldnt change as was with a group) then return to my kids in pjs scarfing cereal while watching tv- then i would be too tired for a family walk. I amended my guilt by ensuring i am home by 9:30a.m. and the tv has to be off by 9 a.m. Last guilt trip: I am exercising and dieting to get healthy – and physically it is working – mentally I am morphing into a complete grumpy bitch. Apparently refined sugar is my needed mood stabilizer, who knew?
Last weekend, by Sunday afternoon, I was so fried I told my daughter Central Park was closed when she asked me to take her to the playground.
I’m going to NY with my husband for our honeymoon, leaving my 2 year old back home with his grandma. We’ll miss him, but never considered taking him, not for a minute.
I’m stealing the “do you shave your vagina?” question. I totally am! The next time some nosy stranger says something to me about how to parent my kiddo while we are in the check out aisle at Target, this is what I’m going to say. This is going to be my response. I can’t wait! Bring it on nosy childless bitches!
After months of trying to get my husband to take more ownership of caring for our daughter, on one of the few nights I was going to get to go out (literally the 6th time I’ve been alone is FOURTEEN MONTHS), I left him with virtually no food for her and a note that said “Oops, guess we ran out. Shouldn’t be a big deal to run to the grocery with her. Have fun!” Not mature or good mommy behavior, because who runs the risk of letting their kids get super hungry, but I really needed him to experience the not-so-fun parts of parenthood that he ALWAYS ESCAPES because he’s “the good daddy” and I’m “the mean mommy”. (Sigh)
When my son was quite little and a diaper leaked in the night, I would throw a towel over it and put him back to sleep in the crib. Sometimes I’d ‘forget’ to wash the bedding in the morning because it seemed to be so much work when he’d just leak again.
His mattress protector is worth its weight in gold.
My kids sleep until 10am and I still end up complaining I’m tired. Because I stay up til 3am reading blogs and such. Oops.
my son recently started not napping on weekends. so i make him play in his room and i take a nap on the couch.
Sorry to disappoint! Although I’m hoping for news soon…
The hubs and I do this semi-regularly.I’d rather spend a happy evening with my kiddo then feel rushed and stressed. I takes one kid free hour to do what would take 2-3 if she was home…
I have no kids, but I used to babysit a pair of toddlers. They both loved Star Wars…but had only one lightsaber. Whenever the younger one took it the older one would cry, and vice versa. Finally I took the older one aside and, in a conspiratorial whisper, said that if we let his brother play with the lightsaber now, we could hide it later somewhere only we knew about. The crying magically stopped. I felt guilty about using sibling rivalry to stop sibling rivalry…but I also know what it’s like to be an older sibling. 🙂 And they DID stop crying and played very nicely with each other. He even forgot to hide the lightsaber later, and I didn’t remind him. Lol.
I did the same thing!
I must be the worst of all. I have a ton of parenting by deceit tricks.
“It’s not for sale. It’s part of the display”
“The park is closing, we have to leave”
Changing the time on the clock to put them to bed earlier.
“It was cancelled because they saw lightning”
Listen guys, I’m older, and I’m tired:)This perfect mommy stuff is just designed to make us feel bad. Don’t allow the guilt:)
Sad, but true… it’s always good to hear that other’s find parenting hard, too. I always think I’m alone in my crazy, can’t keep all the shit together world of mothering b/c other RL mothers I know seem to have it all together. That’s why I love the internet and mother’s blogs!
WORD, SISTER!! I’ve got one of those kids too. Mine is thankfully 4 now and we’re approaching something remotely like civilized behavior. Toddlers will push your every nerve, on purpose, until their nerve-pushing finger falls off. Then they’ll have a massive hissy-tantrum, and then do it all over again. Rinse and repeat. Day after day. Month after month. The terrible two’s and three’s have that name for a reason! Z would hit us, tear up her things, scratch herself, and once at age 2 picked up a heavy wooden crate and threw it at her dad’s head, nearly clocking him. You know why? Because honey badger don’t give a sh!t. That’s why. And a 2-or-3-yo is a honey badger. The end. They do grow out of it, but Z’s year of being 3 nearly broke me, too. We almost sent her away to live with her grandparents for a while, and did end up getting her into occupational therapy right about the time she almost got thrown out of preschool. You know the best part? I know it’s not us. Because *she’s our second-born*. Our first-born was challenging too but nowhere near anything like this, and is now a super well-behaved sweetheart. I’m just glad to see the far side of 3 – and I hope the door hit 3 on the behind on the way out!
Yep! Me too!
I know this is old but I just saw it. Yesterday I lost my schmidt and yelled, “what is wrong with you?” at my (gifted) first grade son when he couldn’t reliably skip-count by two’s. Oh. My. Gah. Hello? Patience? Are you out there? I felt like the worst mother on earth.
That’s ok, when I was 10, my mom almost left me in a grocery store…in France. She tries to pretend that she doesn’t remember, but I know that she knows I know.
I bought my son’s love with Plants vs Zombies figurines so he would give me enough computer time in the AM. Now all he talks about is zombies at his catholic 4k school. Backfired.
Bribery is my best friend. I lure my kids by opening a box of popsicles so I can get out of the house and grocery shop in quiet.
That’s such a cute picture of your daughter. I never let my kids have any sweets unless it’s the weekend, I just can’t deal with their hyper behavior all night long afterwards! And I know their teeth aren’t rotting away if they forget to brush and I forget to check. We went to the dentist and they are prone to cavities. Thanks for all these cute blogs I’ve only gotten through a few but I’m loving them!
Tara | http://www.nocavitybug.com