Two weeks ago, I did a giveaway for a Wee Gallery rubber stamp set in which I asked, "If your kid was able to get the tattoo of his/her choice tomorrow, what would it be?" The winner of the giveaway (chosen at random) was Sarah Wiley Joyce who answered:
"My son is 3 months old and he'd get one of those bad ass knuckle tattoos. When in fists, they'd read: S-U-C-K O-N M-E."
Congratulations, Sarah, you are not only the proud owner of a Wee Gallery Rubber Stamp Set, but I also doctored the photo above just for you (original photo source here).
I was going to doctor up some of the other responses as well but it turns out— there is NO NEED. For pretty much every ridiculous baby tattoo you all imagined, there is a substantially more moronic adult person who has already gotten that hideous tattoo for real.
Allow me to demonstrate by matching your responses with actual tattoos.
Zoila: "My 16 month old daughter would get the words "daddy's girl" on one arm and the likeness of her sippy cup on the other." (Editor's Note: I couldn't find the sippy cup but I think the awesome typo more than makes up for it.)
Tina Reynolds: "It would be some kind of scary dinosaur."
Pam: "Ella would get a big hunk of cheese."
Joann: "Buzz Lightyear. Riding a rocket and shooting bullets."
Jessica Anne: "I think I would have a Disney Princess bonanza on my hands."
Momx2: "I just decided to ask her…. she wants a reindeer."
Shannon Baas: "Dora."
Editor's Note: Caption under the sourced photo says that this is just the beginning of a Curious George sleeve. I see he's already got the pudding and I'm sure a train and a bridge are finishing up the scabbing process as I write this.
Viva: "Legos!"
And lastly, nobody mentioned it, but could there be a bigger possible mistake on this earth than the tattoo below?
Eeek Elmo tattoo!! I have to say, that lightsaber tattoo, is almost kinda cool. But this is coming from someone who did just wave kiddy lightsabers about in Toys ‘R Us over the weekend…..
Congratulations to Sarah!
I can’t believe you spent time to find all these pictures. What’s even worse is I can’t believe people got these things tattooed on them.
The cupcake tat you featured for my comment would probably be really close to what my kid would want.
I know you secretly dream of getting that Elmo tattoo on your shoulder, you just don’t want to admit it.
Way, way, way beyond moronic.
Ha ha ha ha! These are awesome. Perfect for a Monday morning.
Sweet Jesus… I can’t believe someone actually got a lightning McQueen tattoo. Went to her blog… Oy. This world is full of the crazies!
For some reason, that was seriously disturbing. Come on people! :/
WOOO HOOOO!!!
I’m so stoked – I know my little Liam will LOVE his new stamps (when he’s old enough to give a hoot – until then they’re mine, ALL MINE! MWAHAHAHA! Unfortunately that is just more proof that I NEED A LIFE.) The picture is AWESOME – I’ve seen the original before (have you seen the one with the baby tying its bandanna on his head?) it’s the exact one I had in mind when I entered the contest!
Anyways, here’s to hoping that ALL of our children are smarter than the arse-holes above and get a real nice KICK-ASS tattoo instead of a botched childhood hero!!! (Being that I have 3 of my own and still want more, I can’t exactly preach that I want him to remain body-art free…)
I hate to break this to you, Alison, but that light saber tattoo is the very definition of “UNCOOL”.
I did, however, find a very cool LEGO tattoo, but the I couldn’t resist the LEGO village people.
If I ever got an Elmo tattoo, it would be of him burning in hell.
OMG— I hadn’t really looked at her blog until you mentioned it. She is thinking of getting another one! You know, “as concept art.”
Congrats! Email me your address and which set you want— safari, garden or dinosaur.
And yes, I saw the bandanna baby with the tattoos as well. Hilarious.
Can’t wait to show my boys the pic of the lightsaber tattoos! Under the caveat of – PICTURE ONLY. Don’t go gettin any ideas… 🙂 Great post!
LOL. Agree. 100%. hahaha
Just please no one tell Ella that cheese apparently died in 2006. She would be heartbroken.
I was SURE the reindeer would be the worst…until I saw ol’ red fur.
Daddies girl?
Sort of takes away from the homage when she indicates there’s more than one!
LOVE this. So. Much.
How people can do this to their bodies.
Oh.
Yeah.
Alcohol.
Bwahahahaha! I love that tramp-stamp Tinkerbell. Boo Boo’s Pre-K Principal’s is on her shoulder. 😉
this is hilarious. i knew there were bad tattoos out there, but these really take it to a whole ‘nother level!
WAHH!!!! Best. Post. Ever. I am so not a tattoo person. And these are all the reasons why. There is not spot on my body that screams for Tinkerbell and though I have a soft spot for the fairies. It would be like wearing a cheesy Disney shirt that you could never take off!
And besides, I’m not a Daddies Girl or a Daddy’s Girl.
I’m surprised I didn’t seen any Winnie-The-Pooh tats here. That was the stupid-tattoo-trend when I turned 18. I settled for the cliche tribal butterfly tramp stamp. Go ahead and laugh. I deserve it.
I can tell her for a fact that cheese was alive and well until I ate it this morning.
First of all, I’m pouring some out for Cheese. But like Jesus, Cheese has risen again. Hallelujah!
Also, I kind of secretly like that Lego tattoo. Not like I’d get one, but it’s not totally uncool. But then again, I was in the 1% that liked jean diapers, so I think I’ve already established that I have horrible taste.
Mazzy will be holding a personal memorial service if Ella would like to attend. Many tears will be shed, mine included.
The reindeer is so obviously a polar bear that the tattoo artist stuck improvisational antlers on. SAD.
There has a got to be a whole site somewhere dedicated to tattoo typos. I found this posted by the actual girl and it didn’t seem like she was aware of the mistake at all.
It’s no excuse. I have drank much alcohol and still, no Disney characters on my ass or looney tunes tramp stamps.
I almost used a different boozy slutty Tinkerbell but decided the lamest tramp stamp on earth was even better.
A friend of mine (who happened to run track in high school) got the nike swoosh on his upper thigh. Took him about 24 hours before he regretted that one. It must suck to have your leg corporate sponsored without getting paid for it.
I’m not a tattoo person either. There is nothing that I am currently into that I can guarantee I’ll still be into for the rest of my life. Even my child. She could turn on me. Who knows?
I think Winnie the Pooh was much bigger with the last generation than with the current one. Which would explain why there are many a twenty year old with piglet on the back of their neck but none of the new moms suggested it.
If you check out the link underneath the lego picture, there are a whole bunch of lego themed tattoos with one black and white wrist tat that I found particularly fetching.
“artist” is generous…
LOVE the blog AND the comments. One of my favorite things about reading the comments to your blog posts is that you actually take the time to read & reply to them! I am so glad I found your blog and have enjoyed “poking around”. Thanks for the laughs!
I loved the cheese and gun show tickets tats.
These tattoos are freaking me out. What is wrong with the human population? WHAT IS WRONG?!?!??!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Sponge Bob forever on someones body! Why!
hahaha! AWESOME!!
…and i’m quite disturbed by sponge bob on the palm of the hand… YIKES!!
One of my friends has Mickey Mouse on her ankle. We were 19 when she got it. I remember asking her if she thought she would like it at 40. She shrugged.
Think ahead, People……
Hello Kitty is my (bloody, crucified) Jesus. That takes the cake for me. I mean, not the happy, somewhat pudgy Mormon Hello Kitty Jesus or the emaciated but not-always-crucified, beatific Catholic Hello Kitty Jesus? Ballsy.
Oh. My. God.
Nooooooooooooooo!
People are all sorts of weird…
Wow. Just wow.
Kudos on the funniest blog post I’ve read all month. I woke my husband up, laughing so hard I cried!
One of my favorite things to do is respond to the comments. Especially while I am procrastinating going to the gym or getting actual paying work done or cleaning my apartment.
Thanks for the positive feedback!
You should have seen the spongebob underwater scene covering the entirety of someone’s back.
There are some CRAZY Hello Kitty tats out there. I don’t even think the Jesus was the worst of them.
Thanks! I have to say, I love when people feel my posts are worthy of sharing with their husbands.
Who. The Fark. Gets a lightening mcqueen tat? That’s permanent! I’m all beside myself here. Personally my fave is the one you doctored up.
Oh geez. I’m dying here. Geez. Seriously, people?
Um…I find this page pathetic in all honesty.
No offence but its not up to you what people have as a tattoo design, They might wanted a Lightning Mcqueen tattoo as a Tribute to Disney or there favorite film or a Tribute for there son or daughter…I dont know her but I am just giving my opinion.
I am getting a Lightning Mcqueen tattoo as a Tribute to Disney because it is my favorite film and I am a fan of Disney…That doesnt mean I have a “Childish” tattoo…
My friend also has a cupcake tattoo because her nan died and before her nan died she designed a cupcake and then in respect of her nan..she had it tattooed on her as a Tribute to her nan’s life.
I think you should think about things before posting about Tattoo’s that YOU think are childish when it can be very special to someone else.
Is that a polar bear with antlers on her ass? And after reading the above comment– I have to let you know that not all of the Amy (amie)’s of the world are lacking a sense of humor.
It’s funny that I stumbled upon this blog…I am actually the proud owner of the Curious George tattoo. 🙂 It has since become a half sleeve and is quite beautiful. Just to give you some insight, I carried my Curious George doll everywhere I went until I was 11 years old. That being said, there are a ton of wonderful childhood memories that tie into my parents, grandparents and great grandparents and I was able to put a bit of all of them in with my tattoo. We all have reasons for doing things, some of us even put a great deal of thought into the art that we decide to put on our bodies.
It’s also worth noting that I am a woman, a successful business owner (you can see my work on instagram under the name iknowagirl), and I didn’t get any nasty scabs 😉 Thanks for the feature!