On Monday night, Mike and I saw a movie. Yes, a movie. It's one of those talkie pictures with the colors and the sounds and the oversized popcorn/soda combos and the person behind you who is talking too loudly while kicking the back of your chair. I know, I had forgotten too.

I wanted to see "The King's Speech" but Mike insisted on seeing "Limitless" because A) he thought "The King's Speech" would be boring, B) he's a boy and boys are stupid and C) I have a friend that insists Mike looks like Bradley Cooper. (You should know that my friend's nickname is Governor Patterson.)

It was fine. But not great. And the ending sucked. In the heirarchy of "movies you need to see this year", "Limitless" comes just slightly above "National Treasure 3" (which is not out yet but I feel comfortable in my sight unseen review).

Unfortunately, this mistake in movie selection hurts dearly because I might not be able to justify another theater going opportunity until we can safely leave Mazzy at home by herself. A time I refer to fondly as "The Year 2025".

This is because while we once thought $13.00 was an outrageous amount to spend on a movie ticket (that's what they cost in Manhattan), with the addition of a sitter, we now spend no less than $70 for two. That ups the stakes a little. For instance, Adam Sandler? Sorry, you are a NO GO. In order to get me to see one of your funnyman vehicles, you either have to bribe the Coen brothers to cast you in their next flick or offer a $65 rebate.

But no worries, because thankfully, I found abridged versions of all the Oscar winning movies this year online. Now instead of hiring a sitter for ten separate evenings at a cost of $700, I can watch them all in about five minutes FOR FREE. And since I now have trouble diciphering adult-type communication where words are strung together in actual intelligible sentences, I am happy to report that in the abridged versions, there are no adults to be found.

"The Social Network"


"127 Hours"


"The Fighter"


"The Black Swan" (click here for my actual Black Swan review)


And finally, "The King's Speech"


Mike was right. Even clocking in at :36 seconds, "The King's Speech" is pretty boring.

You can check out Kids Act Out on AOL for "True Grit", "Inception" and "The Kids Are Alright". But for the record, I picked the best ones.

OK, now I have the following questions:

1) What was the worst movie you wasted precious babysitter money/time on?

2) What movie star will you no longer shell out money to see?

Original picture above by Steve Rhodes on flickr (I hope he doesn't mind me altering it…)