Ridiculous Lists Archives - Page 3 of 10

05/25/16

Incessant Potty Breaks and 20 More Problems Dining Out with Kids

Why do toddlers always request a bathroom break at the precise moment your meal arrives at the table? Guess you’ll be eating that dish cold. If at all.

05/24/16

45 Excuses My Three-year-old has for Not Being Asleep Right Now

It’s 9pm. Do you know where your child is? I do. She’s up complaining about one of numerous things that is wrong with her current bedtime situation.

05/11/16

15 Ways Playing Sorry! Is Just Like Motherhood

Game night usually starts off with someone saying, “You know what would be fun?” and ends with people crying for reasons that no one understands.

05/10/16

12 Problems Dining Out with Kids

My kids are not acting in this video. This is what they do EVERY TIME WE GO OUT TO EAT.

05/09/16

19 Hilariously Honest Portraits of Mom Drawn by their Kids

There’s nothing more heartwarming than your kid drawing a portrait of you that makes you realize it’s time to pluck your eyebrows.

04/27/16

20 Things that Will Totally Happen if You Bring Your Kid to Work

Unless your job is “zookeeper” or “running back,” taking your kid to work involves sticking them in front of an iPad while you attempt to get 1/8 of the work done you would on a normal day.

04/26/16

Yelp Reviews of Meals Made in My Toddler’s “Restaurant”

No matter how much hype you’ve heaped on the pretend food coming out of your little chef’s play kitchen, I’m guessing you would never recommend your toddler’s “restaurant” to others.

04/14/16

15 Reasons Your Kids are Really Following the Rules

Next time your kid follows a household rule, feel free to pat yourself on the back. But please know their motivations are probably very different than you imagine.

04/13/16

8 Ways to Screw Up a Play Date

Every mom has different rules and philosophies, and there is no time this becomes more glaringly obvious than when you have to parallel parent.

04/07/16

13 Reasons the Rain Sucks with Kids

I have hated the rain my whole life (it does not agree with my hair AT ALL), but rain as a parent is a thousand times worse.

04/05/16

Why I HATE HATE HATE Going Under the Parachute with my Kids

Is there something you are supposed to like doing with your kids that you just DON’T? For Karen Alpert (aka Baby Sideburns), that thing is the GODDAMN PARACHUTE.

03/17/16

You Know You’re a Parent on St. Patrick’s Day If…

You probably used to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day by drinking too much Guinness with friends. Now it’s a little different.

03/02/16

Ultimatums: The Dead End of Parenting Tools

You try logic, you try reason, you try begging and bribery, but eventually desperation leads every parent to the dead end of negotiation tools: the ultimatum. FYI, those never ever work.

02/26/16

A Mom Who Hasn’t Seen Any of the Movies Imagines the Plot of Each Best Picture Nominee

This weekend is the Oscars and I have not seen any of the movies. I did catch pieces of “The Martian” while tending to two small children on a plane, but I don’t think that counts.

01/27/16

9 Resolutions Most Moms Have Already Broken

Here’s what happens to parents when reality sets in and we remember why we had all those delightfully terrible habits in the first place.