Two weeks ago when I posted “12 Problems Dining Out with Kids,” I asked you all to chime in with any problems I missed. The overwhelming response? POTTY BREAKS.
The reason I didn’t include potty breaks is because then the video would have to be twenty minutes long and filmed almost entirely in the bathroom. Eventually, I would have passed out from starvation and Harlow would have fallen in the toilet. At least Mazzy and Mike are enjoying their meals, right?
While that might not make for a riveting video, yes, you are correct. It would be very accurate.
For whatever reason, Mazzy has never been big on potty breaks but Harlow’s favorite thing on earth (ever since we started potty training) is requesting numerous trips to the bathroom. Often we go to the bathroom and Harlow sits on the seat for what feels like five hours but it’s a premature and nothing happens. Then we go back to the table and five minutes later, she says, “NOW I have to go to the bathroom.” We go again and hopefully she read her bladder right this time but if not, we sit, go back to the table and make a few more trips until she gets it right.
This is really the one area where your kid has complete control over the situation because obviously you are not going to come down on a newly potty trained kid for requesting a bathroom visit. Also, you are not going to risk your newly potty trained kid peeing on the floor by taking JUST ONE BITE of the meal just placed in front of you, which is ALWAYS the precise moment a kid announces they have to go to the bathroom.
You just have to wave goodbye to your hot meal and try to remind yourself that if you did get to stay at the table, you probably wouldn’t get to eat your meal in peace anyway.
Because here are 20 more ways dining out with kids can go wrong:
1) The food for the grown-ups arrives before the kids, even though you specifically requested that the kid meals arrive first. – Emily
2) There are never enough napkins! (And then they wipe their hands on YOU.) – Briana
3) Even if the kids are patient leading up to the meal, all decorum goes out the window the second they are done with their food which is usually about three bites in. – Jillian
4) My toddler stands in his seat and shouts “I’m DONE!” repeatedly until one parent finally agrees to take him outside to destroy the landscaping. – Lissa
5) What about when you walk in carrying your already sleeping toddler and try to just leave them splayed across your body so they don’t wake up? You end up numb on one side of your body, but you get a free hand to eat so win-win! – Andrea
6) The only things your kid wants to eat is off your plate. – Mica
7) My kids can never decide who sits next to mommy and who sits next to daddy or if they would rather sit next to each other. This results in many swapping seat maneuvers until everyone or no one is satisfied. – April
8) Your kid wants ice and sticks her hands right in your glass to help herself. – Mica
9) You wait FOREVER for the food to arrive and then when it finally does, your kid spills his water all over his plate. – Roz
10) When the server has to break the news to your kid that they are all out of mac and cheese. – Jessica
11) I once took a sip of water that my daughter had poured a full shaker of salt in. – Brenda
12) When your kid starts having a meltdown and the server thinks they are solving it for you by bringing over ice cream. Ummm… hello??? I don’t want to reward a tantrum! And we haven’t even eaten dinner! – Michelle
13) I have a strict no iPhone/iPad at dinner policy which works wonderfully until we go out with friends who happily hand over their phones to their kids. – Kristin
14) How about the repeated “Can we go now?” requests after they’ve finished and you’ve barely started eating? – Annabelle
15) By the time you cut up your kid’s meal to his satisfaction, your meal is cold. – Claire
16) When servers keep putting items down right in front of the kids – like breakable glasses or hot plates. – Heather
17) My toddler constantly stands in the booth and turns around to annoy the crap out of the people eating behind us. Which is worse only if the booth behind us is empty, because then she will try to climb over to sit there instead. – April
18) When your kid gets excited about her meal until she sees said meal and it is not what she expected. “OH NO! IT HAS SAUCE!!!!!” – Momma Awesome
19) When all three of them need to go potty at once and I’m the only person there, so I take them and then I come back to a cleared table. WHAT?! Did you think I skipped out on the bill? We weren’t finished! – Heather
20) When nobody eats anything so you go home and have to make them dinner anyway. – Ilana
I hope that’s it, because one more problem would really throw me over the edge.