Some people think Halloween is the scariest thing that happens in October. Really? Halloween? That holiday where you dress your toddler like the old man in Up and then give him a miniature bag of Skittles?

That doesn’t sound scary in the slightest.

Scary is tiptoeing into your newborn baby’s room in the middle of the night, poking your head into her bassinet and seeing this:


Scary is telling your toddler you made chicken nuggets for lunch but they were out of dinosaur nuggets so he’ll just have to make due with the regular kind…


Scary is waking up in the middle of the night and meeting the eyes of your three-year-old standing at the foot of your bed…


Scary is telling your toddler you are going back to work and that you hope he will be nice to your new sitter…


Scary is telling your little angel daddy is going to be home late so she’s stuck playing with mom until bedtime…


I think you get the idea. All the above photos were finalists in last year’s Evil Baby Glare-Off. Sydney, the newborn in the swaddle, took home the grand prize.

I don’t have a prize lined up yet but it’s not going to be big. This is an unsponsored event since no brand wants to be associated with the devil’s spawn. I don’t blame them. This contest is about bragging rights more than anything else.

I will be taking photo submissions on the Mommy Shorts facebook page (just post them on the wall with your child’s first name) from now until Friday, October 17th, when I will announce the 32 finalists competing in the Evil Baby Glare-Off bracketed tournament. You can also enter by posting a picture on instagram tagging @mommyshorts and #evilbabyglareoff.

Here’s the bracket from last year so you know what you are getting yourself into…


The tournament will take place over the course of one week on Mommy Shorts, with each day narrowing the pool until the final two go head-to-head on Friday, October 24th.

The winner will be announced on Monday, October 27th.

Photos should be of kids 0-5 years old and as close-up of their faces as possible. Please make sure to read my photo policy before submitting.

It is at my sole descretion who makes it into the contest, but as always, I will be asking you to “like” your favorite contenders on the Mommy Shorst facebook page to help me with my decision. I will also be conducting preliminary rounds on facebook next week, so if you really care whether your evil baby gets a spot, I suggest you follow me there.

I think that’s it for now.

Except, if Harlow was eligible, this would have been the picture I submitted:

DSC_2816laurence (1)a

Scary is telling your toddler it’s time to take away her pacifier.

Good luck to everyone and may the evilest baby win!