Mike and I spent last week on vacation in Mexico while my mother watched after Mazzy. The vacation was wonderful for several reasons:
1) The weather was PERFECT.
2) The resort was awesome.
3) I downloaded the Hunger Games trilogy on my Kindle before I left and cannot remember the last time I was so obsessed with reading. (Maybe with the Sweet Valley High series back in elementary school?) I finished all three books by the time the plane touched the ground on the way home.
4) My new heatfree curls technique works wonders in the tropics. (Do you know how hard it's been trying to maintain flat ironed hair at the beach all these years?)
5) SWEET SWEET SWEET SLEEP.
I slept in the room, I slept in the courtyard outside of our room, I slept by the pool, I slept on the beach, I even fell asleep during a facial and woke up only when I realized I had drooled into whatever concoction was currently being rubbed into my face.
It's no secret that I was having a tough time with Mazzy in the weeks (months?) leading up to our trip. She's been stubborn and hot-tempered and whiny and well… TWO.
And work, which is usually the source of some salvation, wasn't making my time away any easier because I was working overtime for a new business pitch.
It is so hard to come home from work when all you want to do is tune out, but instead you have to be a parent. Maybe that sounds horrible but I was really struggling. And Mazzy, of course, wasn't making things any easier.
I found myself rushing through our few precious hours together— the end goal always being to put Mazzy to sleep.
So vacation was a welcome reprieve from both work and motherhood.
Of course, after the initial high of ditching my responsibilites, I missed Mazzy. Maybe not in the first few days but definitely by the fourth.
For Mazzy's part, she seemed totally fine. The girl has no separation anxiety whatsoever— which is probably one of the reasons we are okay with leaving her on occasion.
She was thrilled to be with Grammy (a woman who would purchase the entirety of Toys 'R Us for her, if she had the funds) and didn't have a moment to pine for her parents what with Grammy's master plan to win Mazzy over with an action-packed schedule (the farm, the zoo, the children's museum— and that's just DAY ONE).
Even while skyping, Mazzy was barely interested. Parks to go to, animals to see, etc.
I'm not sure what I was expecting when we got home, especially since my last memory of coming home from a trip was Mazzy smacking me in the face.
But this time was thankfully, very different.
We got home late at night so we were there when Mazzy woke up in the morning. When I went into her room in the morning, she shot up out of bed and yelled "MOMMY?!" with a combination of surprise and delight that couldn't have made me happier.
This past weekend, I found myself really being present with her for the first time in awhile. Helping her sort and re-sort her shells from Mexico, taking my time with bedtime stories, walking her all the way to the playground with the good sandbox— even remembering to bring her pail and shovel.
And she seems genuinely excited to hang out with us— and not just because we are the people who supply her milk and crackers. She's still cranky after her naps and shunning dinner but she is also being uncharacteristically free with the hugs and kisses.
When she wraps her arms around me for a hug, I feel her arms close completely around my neck and she lingers there for a bit unlike before. (Mazzy's never been big on cuddling.)
In fact, at the end of our first day back, Mazzy crawled into my lap and said this complete sentence, word for word:
"I had so much fun playing with you today, Mommy."
Seriously? How could I not be totally in love with my kid?
Vacation was good.
For several reasons.
Note to self: Take a vacation with husband for a week at an awesome location.
So glad to hear you had a fabulous time, that Mazzy was all good, and extra cuddly when you got back. Everyone needs a parenting break.
Yes, everyone needs a break from parenthood. So glad you enjoyed your vacation and that your daughter enjoyed her time with grandma too.
We’ve taken my son with us on all our vacations, but I guess I still find it very relaxing because I can focus on him instead of coming home from work, exhausted and spending little time playing with him before rushing him off to bed. It gets hard so vacation is the one thing we look forward to.
Hooray for vacation!! Always great to change your perspective. What a great welcome home too. Thanks for the reminder of how great it is to go away (and return).
So, I was already on the verge of tears because of a sad story on the news and the adorableness of this almost put me over the top. I’m apparently very emotional this morning.
that sounds incredible, except for the part where you forgot to invite me. I loved the Hunger Games too, except for Mockingbird, which I disliked intensely and still can’t bring myself to finish.
I’m so glad that you got away and could come back to parenting refreshed! Glad that Grandma and Mazzy had a great time too. I’m sure if my husband and I got away, we’d miss our son in just a few days too. How sweet was it of her to be so delighted to see you! Hope that feeling can last forever!
My husband and I went away for a five-day trip a few weeks ago and I felt like our two year-old was actually pushing us out the door – “Bye! See you later! See you soon!” – when we left her with her grandparents. She’s also non-cuddly and sometimes slaps me in the face (her name is Molly so maybe she and Mazzy can start a bank-robbing business together or something – Mazzy and Molly). Anyway, at first it kind of stung a bit that she could just detach so easily but then I realized holy lord, we are LUCKY! It’s such a gift to be able to get away and be a couple again, and not just parents. And to know that back home the girl is having a grand old time – and learning that it’s okay to be away from mommy and daddy sometimes. As the grandparents say, it’s a win-win.
Mockingjay had a pretty dark tone (was my least favorite of the 3 as well), but I found the ending to the book pretty satisfying for several reasons (I won’t elaborate for the obvious spoilers!).
I just got back from a getaway with two of my closest girlfriends and could not agree with this post more! This weekend was amazing, mostly because I was excited to be home and be the “Mommy-me” again. Thanks for reinforcing what I was feeling!!
God, I need a break!!!!!!!!
That sounds fabulous, the vacation, the extra cuddly kid, all of it!
Oh my goodness…I want a vacation so bad…
so glad you got the break you needed..I think we all need a little time away from the day to day to day of dealing with little people and I think THEY need it too. Mazzy’s hugs are proof of that. 😉
xo
so happy for you!!
How great for all of you! Glad you could reboot!
Oh so very lovely. All of it. So glad you enjoyed your time away, and are now enjoying your sweet moments of coming home. xoxo
I am so happy for you! Sounds like a change is as good as a rest or a rest is as good as change for all of you 🙂 That is awesome, sometimes we just need that break in routine to reappreciate it 🙂 xo
so great you were able to have a vacation, my oldest is eight and my husband and i have never been away more than a night.
I love that she didn’t slap you…she’s growing up! Love her sentence and glad you got to recharge!
I’m SO jealous!
Oh how I would love a vacation. I could use like 7 months off though. Loved your post!!!!
I think I need a break. I want a week to sleep and relax and rejuvenate and not have to go straight from work mode to mommy mode and feel like an utter failure on both fronts.
But mostly I just want to enjoy my kid again. Because right now – at the end of a week where I have lost my temper with her whining and stubbornness and defiance and hot-tempered little mean streak far more often than any mom should – I find that I’m just… not. And that makes me sad.
Reminds me so much of the early years with my daughter (she wasn’t much of a cuddler either & as a parent that’s really all you get so I got nothing). As a parent you need that time away. My husband and I escaped a few times and it was pure bliss. Of course coming home was joyful too when you see how much you mean to them.