I’m about to talk about smells. Not the good kind (we’ll get to that later). The kind that makes you break out the air freshener spray even though you hate the way the air freshener spray smells. You’re just hoping the metallic odor of the air freshener will disguise the even worse smell.
What does it say about air freshener that we spray it as far away from our bodies as possible and then hold our breath as we run out of the room like we have three seconds before the whole bathroom detonates?
Did I say bathroom? Yeah, that’s where the worst smells in our house happen (totally not my doing *ahem*), plus I wouldn’t dream of bringing the air freshener out of the bathroom where it could actually be sprayed near things we eat and sleep in.
I do not trust my air freshener. I do not want to inhale it. I do not want to eat it. I basically use it for EMERGENCY SMELL SITUATIONS. And smell emergencies only exist in my house when we have visitors. Otherwise, I’d rather wait out the natural stench than breathe in the chemical fumes of the supposed “freshener.”
This is why I am so excited Method just launched its new air refreshers. They come in lovely natural scents: french lavender, beach sage, wild poppy, sweet tangerine and fresh clover. The beach sage is my favorite, followed by the sweet tangerine. Mazzy likes the fresh clover. I asked her what she thought it smelled like and she said, “leaves”. EXACTLY.
Since it’s Method, I know all the products are non-toxic and eco-friendly. The new air refreshers are designed with revolutionary pressurized air technology, which means unlike most traditional aerosol sprays (which are powered by petroleum-based propellant mixed in with the product), they are powered by PURE AIR.
How that works exactly, I don’t know, but I don’t really know how my TV turns on either. All I know is that when you spray, you fill your room with one of Method’s vibrant all-natural scents. No CFCs (those are the things that destroy the ozone). No dirty propellants. No need to run out of the room screaming.
Today, Method and I are launching something really exciting. Remember when I created the Healthy Mama ad campaign earlier this year and then asked you all to write your own headlines for a chance to win $750? And you guys wrote way funnier lines than I did to begin with?
I’m doing the same for Method Air Refreshers. I created five mock ads (one for each of their fresh scents) talking about the things that stink in my house.
Here goes…
Now, I’d like to throw it to you guys to come up with even better, more specific, stinkier headlines (I’m assuming things smell bad in your house too), for the chance to win a grand prize $1,000 Target gift card and a year supply of Method Air Refreshers.
Plus, nine secondary winners will get a $50 gift card and the complete line of Method Air Refreshers.
Enticing enough for you?
To enter, just make sure you…
1) Follow both Method and Mommy Shorts on facebook
2) Share this post in some way (like/share on facebook, tweet on twitter, call your mom, etc.)
3) Leave a comment below. (You can enter multiple times, but please only leave one headline per comment.)
The structure should be as follows:
It’s like Mad Libs for horrible household smells! (Feel free to incorporate car and office stench too.) If more than one person enters the same stench, I will select the headline I think is worded the best. If they are worded the same, preference will go to the person who commented first.
You can find the full rules here.
I’ll post some of my favorites next week and then gear up to my ten finalists on September 4th. Then the winner will be selected by vote on September 17th.
If the headlines are funny enough (and I know you guys are funny)— there’s a slight possibility Method could actually use this in their Air Refresher campaign…
Fingers crossed and good luck!
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This post was sponsored by Method, but all thoughts, opinions and ad mock-ups are my own.
Instead of the living room smelling like everything my dog rolled in and/or ate today, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of the “soccer mom” van smelling like sweaty feet, I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the recently discovered and might I add, unidentifiable left-overs, I’d like it to smell like Tangerine.
Instead of my car smelling like, seriously…What. Is. That? I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my foyer smelling like 20 dogs peed on my 4 pound dogs wee wee pad I’d like it to smell like cinnamon sticks!
Instead of my WHOLE HOUSE smelling like the skunk that my dog encountered while outside I’d like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of the living room smelling like wet dog, I’d like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of my house smelling like burnt turkey on Thanksgiving, I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of the bathroom smelling like a room full of dirty diapers, I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my boys’ room smelling like a stale combination of dirty socks, farts, and Essence Of Puberty, I like it to smell like French Lavender – Sincerely a mom of seven, six of them boys
Instead of the trashcan smelling like a dead animal, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the bedroom smelling like a hangover and bad decisions, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
like Sweet Tangerine.
Oops.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like my kids’ sockless summer feet, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my living room smelling like our whole family has been battling a stomach bug (read: throw-up), I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like last years’ forgotten school lunchbox, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my living room smelling like potty training triplets, I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my closet smelling like “I really shoulda worn socks with those shoes”, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like forgetting to switch the wet clothes to the dryer…again, I’d like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like my son used the potty on everything but the toliet, I’d rather it smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like my kids played “hide-and-mom-seek” with their unwanted veggies, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my father’s room smelling of old man and rotting teeth, i’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my guest bathroom smelling like a three-day-old surprise clog, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my car smelling like rancid milk from a bottle that rolled under the seat I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my husbands man cave smelling like it hasn’t been cleaned since last years Super Bowl, I’d rather it smell like beach sage.
Instead for the living room smelling like rotten egg salad after my infant son farts, I’d like it to smell like beach sage!
Instead of my laundry room smelling like a 5 year old boy’s sharted underwear, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of my favorite fuzzy blanket smelling like my dog threw a frat party and served only beer and cabbage, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my minivan smelling like that sippy cup full of almond milk left to fester in 90 degree weather, I would love it to smell like beach sage (and bring me to that kidless vacation in my mind!!).
Instead of my laundry room smelling like mildewed mountains of futility and failure, I’d rather it smell like Sweet Tangerine.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the dinner i just burned, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine!
Instead of my nursery smelling like processed blueberries, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my bedroom smelling like the Dutch oven I just released I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Not to be confused with poopy. That would be bad.
Instead of my school’s bathroom smelling like my classmates forgot how to flush a toilet (yet, somehow got into college), I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of the closet smelling like dirty shoes after a shift at the bar, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of our bedroom smelling like old farts live there I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of the twins’ dueling diaper explosions smelling like something I should call a HAZMAT professional about, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my garage smelling like someone decided to keep skunks as pets, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my living room smelling like a flamingos habitat I’d like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of my son’s room smelling like dried jizz and gym socks, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the boys’ latest pee fight, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of this hotel room smelling like Great Aunt Pearl stayed here before we did, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
I am canadian, so I can’t officially enter, however…
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the compost I forgot over the winter and had to detoxify, I’d like for it to smell like Lavender.
True story. It was awful and it took over 4 hours to air to bearable. I had to stay outside on the deck just to breath, and that was with all the windows open and fans blowing.
Instead of my car smelling like my preschooler’s sweaty and dirty plastic shoes (aka the blue shoes, aka the only ones he’ll wear), I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like “No officer, that’s not a rotting dead body you smell; I made chicken enchiladas three days ago and forgot to take my trash out..” I’d prefer it to smell like Fresh Clover!!
Instead of my car smelling like an iced Venti soy espresso explosion, I’d like for it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of the nursery smelling like sextuplets instead of a singleton, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of my car smelling a missing sippy cup of milk in summer, I’d like to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the only port-a-potty at Oktoberfest, I’d like to to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my living room smelling like bath day at an underfunded animal adoption agency, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my teenage son’s bedroom smelling like… well, my teenage son’s bedroom, I’d like to to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like we all enjoyed a hearty serving of asparagus with dinner, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the rotting bag of kale that I was supposed to use in my daily health shake, I want it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my minivan smelling like bitter resignation, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my car smelling like crushed goldfish and apple juice containers fermented by the sun, I want it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like the litter box is wildly full of ploppy, I want it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my basement smelling like dormant treadmill, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Rotten potatoes smell incredibly foul. Who knew?
Instead of my trash can smelling like an apocalyptic cheese incident, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead if our mud room smelling like a cat sanctuary, I’d like it to smell like Fench lavender.
Linda, I saw this one above. Not deleted.
Instead of my husband’s closet smelling like my husband’s armpit,
I’d like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like puberty,
I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my station wagon smelling like Burning Man
I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my home smelling like cats, husbands, children, and a Labrador too, I would like it to smell like Wild Poppy. My nose would thank me too!
(Post deleted! )
Instead of my boy’s room smelling like a vivisected TonTon, I would like it to smell like Beach Sage.
I thought it smelled bad… from the outside….
Instead of my basement smelling like crusty streaked underwear and feet, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my kids’ bathroom smelling like a three-day-old unflushed potty, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of my living room smelling like whatever just escaped from my chihuahua that startled her, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like what my newly-potty-trained toddler has just proudly called me in to see, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like my husband left a triathlon’s worth of sweaty clothes at the bottom of the hamper for a week, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the kid’s room smelling like wild poopy, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my car smelling like lost cheerios, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the playroom smelling like a mixture of broken crayons and playdough, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
And… I’d just like to clarify… I’m just joking. This thankfully is not my life.
Instead of my house smelling like Pepe Le Pew, I’d like it to smell like au naturel French lavender.
Instead of a public restroom smelling like old lady cooter, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of the living room smelling like the cat needed us all to know HE is in charge, I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my daughter’s laundry basket smelling like the diaper pail (Oops!!), I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my basement smelling like my cat just increased the square footage of his litter box, I’d rather it smelled like beach sage!!
Instead of my toddler son’s room smelling like he just broke into and spread the contents of the diaper genie, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the after math wrath of my butt unleashing a fury after taco Tuesday, I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my daughter’s daycare room smelling like butt explosions, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Also Well.ca has it and delivers to your door!
Instead of my dog’s kennel reeking of dried sweat off a plumber’s crack and regurgitated hotdogs, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my husband’s man cave smelling like… well… a man, I would like it to smell like Fresh Clover.
Instead of my storage room smelling like Grandma’s old mothballs, I would like it to smell like Wild Poppy.
Instead of my teeny tiny office smelling like cigarets, body oder and good ‘ol funk from my last client, I’d like it to smell like Sweet Tangerine.
Instead of our bedroom smelling like a dog who hasn’t been bathed in three months and sleeps on the bed, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my car smelling like the raw chicken scraps and rotting food filled garbage can right next to it in the garage, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my kitchen sink smelling like a two day power struggle over who’s going do the dishes, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of our master bathroom smelling like a week’s worth of saved up broccoli farts (not saying whose), I’d rather it smelled like wild poppy.
Instead of the boudoir smelling like hubby’s stank dirty socks and Del Taco scented crop dusting, I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead it smelling like Jesus himself descended from Heaven to burn his beautiful bearded face into last night’s black garlic toast and crapped all over my failure of a lasagna, I’d like it to smell like someone else can cook tonight and sweet tangerine.
Instead of the laundry hamper smelling like hubby’s sweaty men’s bikini briefs after running a half marathon, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like baby puke, I’d like
It to smell like wild poppy!
Instead of my 13yr old sons room smelling like a Roquefort blue cheese, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my car smelling like a carsick dog, I’d like it to smell like Beach Sage.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like…oh God. What IS that?!?! No, seriously! Did a squirrel get into the wall and die?! Should I just burn the house down and start over? Instead of that, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of our “special” place in the hallway where we keep our daughter’s diaper pail smelling like the men’s urinal trough at Dodger Stadium, I’d like it to smell like
wild poppy.
Instead of my son’s room smelling like a fish jumped out of his fish tank and is decomposing on his floor (yes – that happened…he claims), I would like it to smell like fresh clover