Logo Two weeks ago I was awarded "The Mouthy Housewives Seal of Approval" for my Scandalous Father's Day Coupon Book — a gift that can really be given for any occasion except a child's birthday party. (Unless you're interested in weeding out your more conventional mom friends— then it's perfect!)

As if their approval wasn't enough, today they have invited me to guest post.

If you don't know The Mouthy Housewives, they dole out Dear-Abby-style "advice" (read: heavy on the air quotes) on topics such as toddler freeballing and telling your friend their cat smells.

Today I am giving "advice" to a woman whose in-laws consistently arrive a few hours early whenever she hosts family events. My answer involves "placenta mocktails" in case you need added incentive to check it out.

If you're visiting for the first time from The Mouthy Housewives, I suggest reading some of my most popular posts. Or if you prefer to keep things current, you can read my post from Monday called "Is the Beach Worth It?" which ends with an eye-opening pie chart. Or vote for "The Unsexiest Male Attire" before the winner is determined on Friday (so far Natasha is leading with her husband's manpris).

For those of you who are here for the marvelous Dr. B (my resident early childhood development specialist), please scroll down to the post below where you will find that she is taking the day off. In her absence, I made a rather awesome glossary (with categories and everything!) of all her posts.

Lastly, if you are here because you can't get enough of my 18 month old daughter Mazzy (and who could blame you), here's a picture of her dragging a humongous sock monkey through the Times Square Toys 'R Us.


She dropped it as soon as she saw "The Wall of 1000 Elmos".