At the beginning of this year, I announced a “Big Purge” in 2018. It was my New Years Resolution to declutter and reorganize our apartment. It was just on Instagram Stories, so you might have missed it. But don’t worry, because you didn’t miss much. After that BIG ANNOUNCEMENT, I never spoke about it again.

The truth is, I started out strong. I met with a woman named Rachel Rosenthal (an organization expert) who promised to help me figure out a better system for all of Mazzy and Harlow’s stuff. She’d hold my hand while we got rid of stuff, tell me what to keep and coach me on where to put it. I know it might seem silly to some to work with an organization expert, but trust me— after eight years of living with my children, it is pretty clear that this is not something I can accomplish on my own.

Rachel had a ton of great ideas, including a built-in for the front entranceway that would give the kids a place to put their backpacks and shoes. You know, instead of throwing them directly on the floor. But while I was talking with her, I realized I wanted to do more than reorganize. I wanted to redecorate too. And talking about redecorating was like a snowball effect, because that made me realize we also need to do some pretty major renovations.

Everything in our apartment is at least 10-15 years old and literally falling apart. The couch everyone always compliments me on has a pretty big rip in an obvious spot.

It is also really discolored due to a variety of substances that we probably shouldn’t mention. But let’s just say, my sister’s old dog (RIP) claimed her territory there once upon a time. My kids (as babies and potty training toddlers) claimed their territory there too. And that’s not even mentioning the consequences of Vomitfest 2015.

The little kid table that everyone says I should probably throw out is covering some major wear and tear on the floor.

The dining room table has a big chunk of the finish removed because I accidentally hot glued a Halloween costume to it over three years ago.

The kitchen appliances are breaking down one by one. First the drawer under the stove fell on my foot and wouldn’t go back.

Then the kitchen sink started leaking and the only way to use it now is with the hose pulled out so the water doesn’t leak all over the counter.

The water dispenser in the fridge hasn’t worked for about five years.

Plus, we simply do not have adequate storage. I mean, the master bathroom has a pedestal sink! Pretty much the most inefficient use of space in an already small Manhattan apartment.

And the mirror above the sink in the guest bathroom isn’t even a medicine cabinet. It’s just a sheet of glass glued to the wall!!!!

So, after that meeting with Rachel, we agreed that I needed to begin my reorganization journey with a search for decorators/designers for a larger renovation. I’ve made enough decorating mistakes in my life to know that this is also not something I can do on my own. There’s a reason you have never seen the brocade curtain installation in our master bedroom that I thought would be an interesting contrast to our otherwise modern apartment. THEY ARE HIDEOUS.

Also, kitchen and bathroom renovations sound a lot more intense than picking a couch in a catalogue.

But, as eager as I was to get started, my search for a decorator was put on hold when I was contacted out of the blue by a production company casting for a new decorating show on TV with a household name designer. (This story does not have a happy ending so do not get excited.) Obviously, I was ecstatic at the thought that we could get all this done for a lot cheaper than I was imagining. And being on TV would be great blog content!!! But alas, the mysterious out of the blue offer disappeared just as mysteriously. I blame my husband for being unwilling to deliver punny soundbites during the video interview process. After being told we had a really good shot of making it on the show, we waited and waited for the final yes or no, but that final answer never came. It’s still out there lurking somewhere.

Finally, I realized that if I put this project on hold any longer, it wasn’t going to happen and I’d be stuck in our apartment for another year while more things fell apart around us.

Last week, I gave up my TV dreams and signed a contract with Home Polish, who was recommended by Rachel. Based on your style, they help match you with a designer and oversee the process. This is not a sponsored post (I WISH)— I am using their service just like a regular person.

Long story short, they matched me with a designer named Emma Beryl and we started the process this week! We are going to work in conjunction with Rachel (who will be sharing her organization tips on the blog) and my plan is to get all decisions made in the next couple months so we can do renovations over the summer while we are at the house.

My husband doubts it’s going to happen. I get it. It’s more than a little overwhelming. Especially the part of moving everything out so we can redo the floors (any advice would be much appreciated!). It’s giving me major anxiety just thinking about it.

But, I need to prove him wrong. I need to feel like I’m in a fresh space again and I want the kids to grow up in a world where they can put stuff away.

First step is always making an announcement to keep me honest. Here it is!

So much more to come…