Today is Mazzy's birthday but since I skipped last week's Monday Morning post (It was Thanksgiving!) and people feared I had abandoned the project altogether, I am going to postpone Mazzy's birthday post until tomorrow. Don't worry, in real life, she is getting TONS of birthday attention.
My "Monday Morning" series documents mothers in the NY area (chosen at random from Mommy Shorts commenters) to prove there is beauty in every mother's morning, even if we need an outsider to see it. That outsider is lifestyle photographer Raquel Bianca.
First there was Annie from New Jersey, followed by Ilona from Queens and Teresa from Manhattan's Upper West Side. Now we are going to get a glimpse of Jennifer from Brooklyn.
Jen lives with her husband Jon and their kids Ethan (3.5) and Felicity (8 months). I asked Jen for three adjectives she would use to describe her mornings prior to the shoot. She said, "Disjointed, rushed and awkward".
After she saw the photos, she revised her adjectives to "loving, busy and playful", proving once again that motherhood looks very different through someone else's lens.
Jen's strategy is to wake up and shower before the kids get out of bed at 7am. It doesn't always happen but when it does, the morning runs much smoother. (Since my children have been my 5-6am alarm clock for four years now, this is an entirely foreign concept.)
Once the kids wake up, Jen nurses Felicity while Jon gets breakfast for Ethan. There's a beautiful photo of Jen nursing the baby, but she preferred to keep it for herself.
Jen never knows whether they will be getting the Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde side of Ethan's three-year-old personality— "it can really ruin the whole morning". They felt lucky that Ethan turned on the charm the day of the shoot.
Jen's favorite part of the morning is after nursing Felicity, they usually have a few minutes of family time on the couch while she and Jon drink their coffee. They call it "the calm before the storm".
Next, Jen and Jon pass the kids back and forth while they switch off getting the kids ready for the day and getting themselves ready for work as well. She noted that in one photo Jon is putting on Ethan's shirt and in another Jen is finally putting on Ethan's pants. "That sums it up."
One thing that stood out about Jen's photos as opposed to the other mothers in the series, is that the toys were left out and scattered all around the apartment.
I asked Jen if she made a conscious decision to leave them out to be more true to what her morning actually looks like. I had to laugh at her answer:
"No! This is so funny to me, because we really did clean the night before– the apartment was on the clean end of what would be normal for us. It's partly that we have limited space, so even when things are "away" they're not usually out of sight. And it also amazes me how little time it takes two kids to get all the toys back out."
The other thing that stood out to me was how much play seemed to be happening in the morning. I asked if that was typical. She said…
"With our kids so young, they basically go to bed as soon as we get home from work. And we find the evenings to be subject to a lot of other intrusions, especially work-related. So we try to make the mornings count."
While Jen goes to an office every day, Jon is a professor with a varying schedule, so the person last to leave the house (and wait for the nanny to arrive) changes depending on the day.
On the day of the shoot, Jen was the first to walk out the door. She put Felicity down for her 8:30am nap, packed up her breast pump and then left for work.
On the two days a week Ethan goes to preschool, Jen takes him on her way. On the day of the shoot, Ethan was staying at home.
I asked Jen what her reaction was to the pictures and she had this to say…
"It's hard not to be self-critical, but I do think the pictures are beautiful. It surprised me to see pictures that Jon and I were both in. It feels like we're just tag-teaming in the mornings, and not actually spending time together. We try to have the morning be family time, but it feels like we always fall short, and they are a source of working mom guilt for me. The pictures told a different story, and I hope that is more like how my kids experience it. Also, Jon was relieved that one of the other husbands also thought that the photo shoot was a terrible idea. But he liked the pictures! And I found that I liked them even more when we looked at them together."
Thank you Jen for showing us the beauty in your morning.
Even if you kept the breastfeeding photo for yourself.
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If you want to be part of my next project (whatever that might be), follow Mommy Shorts on facebook.
This post is part of a series called "Monday Mornings", documenting five different mothers throughout the NY area, in order to help us see the beauty in our mornings through an outsider's eye. It is done in collaboration with the amazing photographer, Raquel Bianca.
By the way, a shoot with Raquel (morning or otherwise) would make an excellent holiday gift. She is giving Mommy Shorts readers 10% off through December 20th. Just tell her I sent you!
My favorite is the one where Jon is eating, Jen is checking her phone, and Ethan is being awesome in the kitchen. It just feels like real life, but a more beautiful version. Gorgeous photos once again!
It is crazy how different schedules are in New York vs. living in the Midwest. Morning time doesn’t really exist for us. I get myself ready the wake up my son and get him dresses and we are out the door so I can get to work by 7:30. Our quality time is evening time.
this is currently my favorite thing on the internet. it’s made me reevaluate my entire assessment of our own mornings and see the beauty in them. thanks!!!
Yes I am in WI and this is the same way with us! But I also live 7min away from my work and don’t have a commute like I’m sure most New Yorkers do.
I wish there was one in here of a single mom. I work days and my signficant other works nights. The kids and I only see him on the weekends during the days and only in the mornings while hes asleep. I feel like a single mom 5-6 days out of the week. All these pictures have the father helping out in the mornings. I LOVE seeing these pictures and reading how they have changes the way the parents look and feel about their mornings.I know everyone is hard on themselves. I’m up at 5am and have to be out the door with two kids and myself clean and dressed for the day by 6:15am. Not much time for play and leizure in the AM. Lovely photos as always though!
these people and their kids are so gorgeous it’s just not fair!
I love seeing these pictures! I can see the love and ‘togetherness’ of this family. 🙂
I agree with Cassidi! I live in AZ and don’t have any time really with my kids in the morning other then getting them ready and getting them out the door. I usually have to get myself and both of them ready within an hour’s time due to a 20 min commute to the sitter, then an additional 10 minutes back to work. My due time to work varies between 5am & 6am though so regardless we are up super early. Its nice being off by 3pm though so I too get my quality time in the evenings. Would hate to see what my mornings look like on camera, I can guarantee they aren’t nearly as surprisingly pleasant as all of these have been. So jealous!!
These are beautiful pictures. I love the ones showing the kids playing together. Ethan seems to be fascinated with his little sis. Hopefully that will last. I love the name Felicity.
Please pick a Single Mom for this project. I love these photos and envy the moms with another adult to help but I try to make my mornings as beautiful…. I just don’t know if they are….
Single moms are awesome Thushari! You guys are superheroes as far as I’m concerned. We choose them at random in New York and as neither of us were paid to do this series, maybe a brand will pick us up so that we can continue with more moms 🙂 Liking and sharing on social media will help build support!
I love this series! We recently had a change in our morning routine. We went from my MIL caring for my kids before care and an afternoon nanny. Our morning are more hectic, but love every bit of it and would not change a thing.
I love this series. It’s so much fun to see what “normal” looks like for other people!
It would never work for my family though, unless I wanted to look at a bunch of pics of my husband getting the kids out the door. I get up at 3:30, nurse the baby, put her back to bed and leave for work by 4:30. My husband gets up at 6:30 and takes the kids to daycare so he can be at work by 8:30.
I go in early to avoid traffic on my 25 mile (one way) commute and so I can go grocery shopping without the toddler before I pick up the kids by 5pm. At least we have our evenings!
I thought the same thing! It’s just my daughter and I and it very rarely feels beautiful. I often think how nice it would be to shower in peace or have someone tag-team wrestle my mini-alligator to get her dressed in the morning!
This is such a beautiful series and a great reminder to appreciate every minute you have with your family, even when it is just normal living. In the mornings, my 18 month old daughter “helps” me get ready by handing me make-up brushes. It is my favourite part of the day.
i feel like these shoots should be something every family gets at the 1 year mark of having a new child. to show that you are a better parent than you give yourself credit for, especially in the day to day tasks that are done on automatic. I feel that these pictures are the adult equivalent of a gold star in preschool! look how good you are doing….gold star!
I love these posts. What a healthy dose of perspective. It is a beautiful thing to know Mommys all over the world are experiencing similar chaotic mornings each and every day.
Sincerely,
Mom of Two Under Two From Omaha, NE
such beautiful photos! really enjoying this series.
and I have a lot of respect for those who have offered the world a view into their morning.
(coming from someone who has her wet hair in a towel until about 20 minutes before we head out the door and relies a lot on the 5 year old to keep the baby entertained while he’s in his johnny jump up or bouncy seat)
Okay, cutest couple names totally goes to Jen & Jon!
I am so tempted to hire a photographer to do this for me, unless you guys want to come out to Nashville : )
These are such beautiful photos!
The one of Jen hugging Ethan goodbye made me tear up.
Love this series.
Wow a single mom would be such an interesting subject, just as beautiful but different.
And I am so envious of the New York to work by 9 expectation! We west coasters are usually in our offices by 8!
Love it so much, were getting ours done this way. Hopefully 🙂