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I'm glad this week is over. It was tough for two reasons. 1) I just got home from BlogHer and everyone had to readjust. Harlow's schedule had been thrown off. Mazzy was pissed at me for going away. Mike was exhausted. Plus, I was overwhelmed with new information and a thousand new things I SHOULD BE DOING.

How do people spend time writing posts when they're pouring all their energy into managing their Pinterest boards???

You see what I did there? That was a trick to make you follow me on Pinterest.

I did it again!!! (I'm pretty sneaky.)

The other big issue was the end of camp. Mazzy has been going to camp from 9am-2:30pm every day since school ended and suddenly, there was no reason to get her ready in the morning. Mike and I usually start our day by walking her to school/camp and then both heading off to work.

With Mazzy home, it meant Ruth was busy putting Harlow to sleep for naptime at 9am (no easy task) while I would normally be heading off to work. Except, Mazzy was alone in the living room (usually pissed off about SOMETHING), so I didn't know how to walk out the door.

It has become more and more obvious that I really need to sleep train Harlow. If I have put it off for a number of reasons but I'm going to have to get my shit together and figure it out.

What else happened this week?

HARLOW READS UPSIDE DOWN

Yesterday, I posted the picture of Harlow up top on my facebook page. I asked for captions and my favorite is the one in the thought bubble, written by Nancy Weeks Vinella…

"Act natural… act natural… Maybe Mazzy won't realize I'm on her side of the room…"

Come to think of it, I can't believe Mazzy let Harlow touch one of her books long enough for me to snap the picture. Congrats, Nancy! You win the supreme honor of me mentioning your name! (Sorry, I'll plan a prize for next time.) 

Another favorite caption was Corinne Oh, who questioned whether Arthur was actually an aardvark…

"An aardvark? I don't see it…"

I have to agree. Whoever draws Arthur is either an awful artist or a fan of the abstract. Or perhaps Arthur represents the evolution of aardvarks after they've taken over the world, bought our homes, teach in our schools and win all our spelling bees. Arthur is actually a frightening commentary of THE FUTURE.

I also liked Jennifer Wallace's caption, who said…

"I heard if you read it upside down and backwards Arthur slaps his sister on the last page."

If that doesn't work, I'd like to slap D.W. myself.

BABY SIDEBURNS TRIED TO STEAL MY BABY


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At BlogHer, while people passed my baby around, I watched to see who squeezed her a little too tightly. You know, the women who might try to run off while I wasn't looking and make Harlow their own. 

The person who had me the most worried?

Karen aka Baby Sideburns. Some say she hates her kids, but I know for a fact that isn't true. She took one look at Harlow and almost melted into the floor. I wouldn't be surprised if she showed up at my door disguised as Child Protective Services and tried to take her.

"We hear you have no idea how to get your baby to sleep. And you check your email while breastfeeding. I'm going to have to take her into my care until you have these issues resolved."

Karen— if you want another child, make your own damn baby!

SLEEPY MOMS CRASH TWITTER

On Monday night, I co-hosted a twitter party with NickMom under the hashtag #sleepymomsunite. Apparently, there are a lot of sleepy moms out there because we were trending #1 in the United States! 

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We trended above the Bachelorette!!!! (Poor Des. For so many reasons…)

Thank you to everyone who came and commiserated over lack of sleep. The only way it could have gone any better is if we allowed for a half hour nap mid-party. In fact, the popularity of our hashtag was so great, we successfully confounded the hoards of teens and tweens that normally dominate the site. 

Here are some of my favorite contributions:

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I have to admit, some of those tweets made me turn around and look for MY MOTHER.

Alright, friends. Get some sleep this weekend.

Or else THE TWITTER will make fun of you!

xo, Mommy Shorts