Before I begin, let me make one thing clear. If you equate sleep training to a barbaric form of baby torture, please avert your eyes, read something else and come back another day.
THIS POST IS NOT FOR YOU.
I am not interested in someone telling me about the benefits of rocking my baby to sleep; I have been rocking my baby to sleep for almost nine months. I know exactly what the benefits are. The baby feels loved and attended to and cared for and blah blah blah whatever. I'll tell you what I told my own mother who said, "I WOULD NEVER HAVE DONE THAT TO YOU" when I sleep trained Mazzy. I said, "Yeah, Mom. And that's probably why I have had sleep issues MY ENTIRE LIFE."
Besides Harlow taking an hour of aggressive rocking/feeding/pacifying to go to bed, I must be actively involved every time she wakes up throughout the night, because she has no ability to soothe herself to sleep. Why would she? I have never given her the opportunity.
Yes. I am calling "sleep training" an "opportunity". How do you like me now, NAYSAYERS?
Why have I waited this long, if I am so pro-sleep-training?
For one thing, my girls share a room and I was afraid of interupting Mazzy's sleep.
Secondly, I am unsure of how to put them to bed at once since Mazzy usually sings and talks to herself for at least an hour before she passes out.
Thirdly, Harlow became mobile really early so she was always flipping herself over or crawling herself into a crib slat or trapping herself in a corner. She'd get upset and I'd feel the need to help her out. Currently, she won't even allow me to lie her down, choosing instead to flip over, stand up, and hold onto the edge of the crib while screaming her head off, like someone unjustly placed her in BABY JAIL. For some reason, it feels a lot harder to walk away from a crying baby who is standing up, than one who is lying down.
Fourthly (yes, fourthly), every time I announced "sleep training starts tomorrow!", Mazzy would get sick. And then as soon as Mazzy was better, Harlow would get sick. And as soon as Harlow would get better, I would get sick. And by the time I got better, the cycle would just repeat itself. I couldn't add to the misery.
Fifthly, when Harlow wakes up at 4am and I can't figure out how to get her to go back to sleep, I usually pull her into our bed. Then, her head conks down hard on my chest as if my proximity is a heavy dose of Ambien. It feels absolutely HEAVENLY to have a baby passed out on your chest. Part of me does not want to give it up.
Sixthly, Harlow's cry is the most gut-wrenchingly pathetic baby cry of all time. Her wails are long and piercing. She pants like she is hyperventilating. When it's really bad, she takes big gulps and might start to hiccup. Her eyes get red and her nose starts running and her mouth turns down like the cartoon version of a frown. If there was a competition for "Baby's Cry Most Likely to Keep a Parent from Sleep Training", Harlow would win it by a mile.
BUT IT IS TIME.
In addition to the massive amount of rocking needed to get Harlow to sleep and the fact that she is not yet sleeping through the night, Harlow is terrible at napping. All studies seem to indicate that lack of baby sleep will result in a horrible human being.
I don't want one of those.
Also, we have been spending far too much time trying to put Harlow down throughout the day while Mazzy is left in front of a television. Studies say too much television at an early age result in horrible people too.
That's two horrible people in my house, in case you are keeping track.
Mazzy is starting a new preschool in September and I don't want to have to sleep train Harlow when Mazzy is busy adjusting to something else, so this week is the week.
It's happening. I've got Erin, the sleep specialist from Pickles & Ice Cream who put Mazzy through Toddler Sleep Rehab, devising a specialized plan. If it works, I'll be doing a giveaway of her services to celebrate.
I'll give you the deatils of the plan, along with updates throughout the week. Follow me on facebook for real-time coverage/support.
It's going to be ugly, my friends. Like Kim Kardashian cry ugly.
Wish me luck!
Finally we are having a good night’s sleep thanks to the method we found on
Can really recommend it!
my baby is 11 months old she is not sleep before3 to 4 am. some time she sleep 10pm but she wake again with in one or two hour.during sleeping time she rool on bed some time fall down to bed.
I am mother of a two year old naughty daughter. I have experienced no issue regarding my baby sleet until she was 1 year old but after that she don’t want to sleet at all. She usually sleeps late at night (around 11:00 or 11:30 PM).
What should I do?
OOoops it seems natural sleep is much better than sleep training
This is so my life! My 10 month old has always been snuggled and rocked to sleep, then stealthily moved to her crib, where she wakes up later…and I’m too tired to get her back to sleep so she gets in bed with us. And I, too, love the snuggles and am not totally ready to give that up. BUT, here’s the catch…we’re having another baby in 6ish weeks. I can’t have 2 babies that need me to fall asleep. I will become a monster. We’re trying night 1 of sleep training tonight. As I type this my sweet baby is screaming all alone in her room, and I feel like crying. But, I see that your experience was fruitful…hoping mine ends up the same way.
I have a nearly 6 month old who I will be sleep training in 2 weeks when I go to visit my sister down South. Husband and in-laws don’t really support or agree with it (over here where we live) and I don’t have any real support. I understand my husband is just protective of the baby and I don’t want to sound like a selfish mom..I can still wake up to feed him once a night..even twice..but waking up 4 times a night is hard because my family doesn’t live here and I’ll be traveling alone with him with zero support and I just can’t function and be a good mom on 3 hours of sleep and another 1.5 hours broken up. If I can get 3 hours and another 3 hour stretch I am 100% ready to go..but I can’t seem to get that..
I’ve tried a few things although probably not so consistent but a lot of that has to do with shifts we take and I cannot guarantee my husband does the same thing on his shift that I do…We have fought a ton about this..I am willing to give up most of my life as a mom but what I fear is that these 3-4 night time wakings will last into toddlerhood and even the elementary years if I don’t at least TRY to sleep train my little guy now.
I will admit I’ve put it off because I can’t do it when husband is here and making me even more of a nervous wreck because he hates hearing baby cry..So August 26th I will probably sleep train him.
I am really nervous..He is EASY to get to bed, actually..especially at night…but the thing I’m dreading is his multiple night wake ups..He is 18 pounds and healthy..just broke 2 more teeth so in 2 weeks he should be kind of out of this teething spurt..Usually he has a few weeks of it..then a few weeks off..
Kathryn..curious how it ended up going for you. I am really nervous to do this but know it has to be done. I will have to do it when I’m out of town..alone..with my baby visiting my sister because Hubby isn’t supportive of it and can’t bring himself to do it.
Cori..I pray I have these results..You did just cry it out, right? I am looking at the Weissbluth/Extinction method..as I have tried many other things and they don’t work or seem to make things worse..Going cold turkey..Love my sweetie so I won’t lie I am dreading it.
I will have to do it when I am traveling alone with baby to visit my sister in Texas since Hubby is not supportive of sleep training and can’t stand to hear baby cry bc he feels bad for him..and although he loves him he teaches him bad habits so little guy is waking up 3-4x a night..
I hope to receive moral support from my sister..I am so nervous I think I’m going to cry..which is not even like my personality at all..but I really want what’s best for my baby!
Um, PLEASE share results! I’m hair-pulling with my little 6 monther who won’t even nap now…and starting sleep training TONIGHT!
I just found this blog and I love the method of sleep training you used. I wrote about it in my blog and linked back to you, if this isn’t okay, please let me know. Thanks!
[…] web search led me to this blog by Mommy Shorts. While the method she used is tailored for her and her kids, I really like the approach. It’s […]
Thank you for this!!! My 14 month old takes the rocking, caressing, and visual of me at all times to go to sleep. Then it still takes 20 mins (on a good night) to an hour and a half to get him to sleep! Two questions, once it goes quiet, do you not check on them at 10min intervals? And also, are you still doing 3 naps? That’s one more than I do already and not sure if I should try to switch to 3 or leave at 2. Thanks again!!!
The most important thing I see that came from sleep training our first born was that stress levels dropped significantly within weeks after our son started to sleep all night.
Before, he would be waking up every hour/two hours and that was just pure sleep deprivation torture for all of us and you could see just by looking at us that we were going insane. Really, people would comment and ask us if we were ok. In three days of using the method he was crying for a few hours all together… before that, he was constantly cranky during the day and constantly crying.
My wife wrote an article about our experiences called Every child can learn to sleep. The key has always been consistency in all sleep training methods and books so get educated and be consistent!
My 8 1/2 month old has gotten into really bad sleeping habits, waking up 6 times a night needing to be nursed back to sleep. We’ve sleep trained in the past with some success but regressed due to teething. Now I’m terrified to do it again because he’s mobile and won’t just lay there until he falls asleep. Since Harlow was able to stand when you sleep trained, do you have any advice on how to handle him crawling around his crib and/or pulling himself up? How hard was she crying that first night you sleep trained? I can handle crying but when it’s the hyperventilating type crying I feel like I’m doing more harm than good!
[…] made me laugh out loud on several occasions. If you’re in the thick of it, please read the sleep training series. It’s too […]
[…] following night we had it all planned out, taking advise from a blog we found “Its time to sleep train the baby” – I would bath both kids and then nurse Titus while Azalea got to play in the tub a […]
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[…] some sort of therapy, I hit the blog community for help. Lucky me I found Mommy Shorts and her post ITS TIME TO SLEEP TRAIN THE BABY if you want some helpful info just click that link and it’s days worth of how she did sleep […]
Thank you for posting this, we followed your sleep training posts and our daughter now goes to sleep on her own. The first night was torture, one hour and forty seven minutes, each night got better and better. You posts encouraged me when I doubted if I was doing it correctly or if I doubted who was being tortured by the cries. E still cries when we put her to bed but I am very sure she just is peeved that she will be missing something. Thank you again for sharing. BTW I love the videos of Harlow the Super Jew!!!
We have been casually sleep training our 8 month old for the last month. And when I say casually, I mean I cant take the crying after about 15 minutes and I go in and rescue him. But after reading your article and seeing so many similarities to your situation and ours, I gave it a real shot last night and our little guy was sound asleep in 40 minutes and didn’t wake up at all in the night. I don’t know why I didn’t do this sooner! And a bonus, our 2YO put himself to bed while he waited for me to finish the routine with his brother! I realize this is only the first night, and there will still be difficult times, but I am really excited about this new wave of good sleep in our house! (My first was an excellent sleeper from day one and we never had to train him, we put him down and he went to sleep, no crying, no rocking, nothing. So baby #2 was a new ball game for us!) Thanks for posting and giving encouraging wisdom!
Well I was sceptic about any sleep training method because I have the worst sleeper in the history of babies but I’ve heard a lot about guide “How to teach a baby to fall asleep alone” by Susan Urban. The method is without CIO so that’s convinced me. After 4 days my LO sleeps like an angel (nights and days). I still can’t really believe it but it looks like we did it. I even got rid of night feedings so I am super SUPER happy!
So I wanted to encourage everybody who is interested in sleep train a baby to first of all try Susan Urban’s method and follow her instructions and I bet any other method won’t be necessary.
It was quite some time ago but I can see that the guide still available on the same website: http://www.parental-love.com
Thanks for the info about this guide. The method worked great with my little boy.
This short ebook has worked for us as well! Thanks April for mentioning Urban’s guide! I really appreciate it
Same story here! I used this method with this attitude „aw, it won’t get worse anyway” and… It was a miracle! Just 3 night and I’m having a sleeping angel! And the guide itself is really clear I must say. Worth trying.
It might sound a little difficult for me to do a sleep training because my baby has always been sleeping with us. However, I know he’d better sleep alone and that day will come sooner or later. Thanks for sharing and this post is very useful!
I successfully sleep trained my both daughters when they turned 11 and 12 months with “How to teach a baby to fall asleep alone” guide by Susan Urban ( http://www.parental-love.com ). The guide is just GREAT! Step by step instructions, the method is easy and fast. I thought that sleep training is a long process and apparently I was wrong. With both my girls it took me 3 or 4 days to make them to fall asleep alone in their cribs.
Sleep training with this guide made such a difference for me and my babies! I can really recommend it to other parents!
Mamdy, looks like you were right about “How to teach a baby to fall asleep alone” guide! 3 days and my daughter falls asleep on her own without rocking! WOW! No more sleep problems! Thanks for sharing
I am not a fan of reading books about kids but this guide is different! Short with only important info with step by step instructions! The method has worked surprisingly well – in our case only 2 days
After using the method from “How to teach a baby to fall aslep alone” guide I am a strong believer in sleep training. It just made my son sleep! That’s why this guide deserve to be prize! Thanks a lot for sharing the source
I tried many ways to solve problems with my baby’s sleep, byt nothing works better than tips from that e-book: https://www.parental-love.com/shop/how-to-teach-a-baby-to-fall-asleep-alone-pdf
At the age of around 3 months, when put on his stomach, your infant will lift his head and shoulders high, utilizing his arms for backing. The smaller than usual pushup helps to reinforce the muscles which he’ll use to roll over.
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I decided on sleep training at 11 months. Earlier I didn’t even have sleep routine, so there was some work to do. I chose Susan Urban’s HWL method from this short guide ‘How to teach a baby to fall asleep alone’ that I got online ( https://www.parental-love.com/shop/baby-sleep-training ). I am very glad, it turned out to work very fast! Should have used this sooner.
I have the same problem! Thanks for sharing that Susan’s method is still working. I was willing to use it but wasn’t sure it isn’t too late already.
11? that’s late! I’ve barely waited until those 4 months needed! So maybe you didn’t need it that much? Anyway I’m thinking THANK GOD and THANK SUSAN! Her method is so simple it’s like there is no option of not-working, right?
I hope your effort bore fruit!
Sleep training is so important not only for the baby but for the sanity of the parents. it is an incredibly tough journey as I have seen with my daughters, but one that is definitely worth it.
A happy mummy/ daddy= a happy baby
This includes much-needed rest!
Hi! My Johnny, at 11 months old, only slept fitfully, and then on his hands, constantly waking up every night! I tried everything, and found only one salvation for myself. This is Shem’s sleep tracker! With him, our sleep began to improve, although not immediately Shema helped set up my son’s own sleep schedule! You enter everything you know about your child’s dream, and he finds a solution to your problem! And there are a lot of useful articles about children’s sleep. I really like it!
My son, 1.5 years old, fell asleep all the time with his chest, woke up very often, sometimes hung on his chest all night and woke up and fell asleep at different times. It was very difficult to adjust the mode, but my friends advised me to use the Shema sleep tracker . We downloaded it and started trying it out . Two weeks later, Arnie’s sleep began to improve, and we noted each of his dreams . Now there is no need to look for the reason why the baby woke up ahead of time, because there are hints in this app. We listen to the lullabies that are in the app, they are really like from a fairy tale . Now we also recommend this smart tracker.
We recently downloaded this app . Kate had problems with the regime, waking up and falling asleep when she wanted to . The baby is 5 months old , we use the Shema tracker for 2 weeks and already see the result. Yes, there is still a lot to work on , but the app has tips for why my daughter may now be harmful or not want to eat . We still turn on the ringtones before laying, they are in the app and the selection is very cool. I recommend it