This innocent picture of Cormac napping conjured up images of dead body disposal, baby crackhouses, frat house parties and the end of the search for Bobby Fischer. Some thought Cormac was simply the world's worst player of "Hide and Seek" and others thought he was doing a Wicked Witch of the West impression. But the most shocking thing about this week's caption contest? My favorite entry was written by my very own mother.
"First of all, don't judge me for nursing my 3 year old. And secondly, don't judge me for drinking Grain Alcohol while doing so."
Congrats, Natasha! As the new CAPTION CONTEST QUEEN, you will have the supreme honor of judging the next caption contest. I should mention that Natasha also happens to be leading "The Unsexiest Male Attire Competition" with her husband's Bruce Banner Manpris. Perhaps her first order of business should be getting her man to throw out those hideous pants.
As for the rest of you? I'm giving FIRST RUNNER-UP to my mom.
"I'm so glad we had the chloroform blankie on our registy – it's been the best gift ever!"
I am also awarding the following HONORABLE MENTIONS…
"The People's Choice Award" goes to C @ Kid Things who wrote:
"Samuel L. Jackson came over and told the kid to Go The F*ck To Sleep and everyone knows that you should do what Samuel L. Jackson says."
"The Parenting of the Year Award" was a three-way-tie between…
"Exhausted from scrubbing the deck, Cormac dreamed of pillows, blankets and foster families."
"She said 'let's play Hide and Seek' 3 hours ago, and Cormac still didn't realize mom's been on the couch eating Ben & Jerry's, catching up on True Blood ever since."
And Nic @ MyBottlesUp:
"And that, my friends, is how we get to keep the halloween candy for ourselves."
"The Mompreneur Award" goes to Suzi H who said:
"After a few successful tests on the children, Alicia was certain her Baby Ambien lab would be a thriving new neighborhood business."
"Best Informercial" goes to Lori who said…
"From the people who brought you "Cat Caught in Trunk!" and "Witch Hitting Tree!" It's…"Crushed Toddler!" Fool your friends with this adorable pair of stripey-jammied legs adorned with pudgy feet that you can slip under any heavy object! Imagine the hours of laughter that follows your neighbors and family screaming in panic when they think little Bobby/Betty has been squashed flat by a sofa, refrigerator, or…as shown in our photo…an abandoned planter. Order NOW and we'll send you a copy of "A Funny Thing Happened and Then I Called Poison Control" for FREE!!!"
And lastly, "The Brilliantly Brief Award" goes to Suniverse who summed everything up with:
Thanks everyone for playing. (You can read the full list of entries here.) And thank you to Alicia from Naps Happen who let us ridicule her child and her parenting skills. If you've got a funny baby photo that you think would make for a great caption contest, please send it to firstname.lastname@example.org.
As for Natasha? This is your crown. Wear it as proudly as your husband wears his "Hulk Pants". I'll be calling on you to judge the next caption contest soon.