Two years ago, Seri and I arranged for Mazzy and Gavin to go on their “first date” for Valentine’s Day. They were dressed to the nines and had as romantic an after-school adventure as two five-year-olds can have— eating cupcakes, checking out the puppies at the local pet store, etc. Last year, we took Harlow and Luke out for an adorable afternoon of hugs, hot chocolate and doughnuts. This year, we decided to make it a double date with all four kids, something we could not have attempted when they were younger— without risking getting tossed out of the place.

For our 2017 Valentine’s Day venue, I took a chance emailing Black Tap Burger, the tiny restaurant on Broome Street that usually has a line out the door, ever since their crazy over-the-top milkshakes became internet famous.

Turns out, Joe Isidori and his wife are Mommy Shorts fans and they were happy to oblige. They even gave us the coveted window seat and told us we could be one of the first to try their special Magnolia Bakery shake that will only be offered on Valentine’s Day.

Just how crazy are the crazy shakes at Black Tap?

Well, for starters, the Valentine’s Day shake comes with a huge hunk of Red Velvet Cake on the top.

Suffice to say, the kids were quite pleased with their after school snack.

I think, if every drink had to detour through cake before it entered your mouth, the world would be a much happier place.

At first Harlow wasn’t sure how to eat hers because the shake is so tall, but then she realized she could reach the straw if she stood on her stool.

If you are wondering about the extra long scarf, it’s mine. I gave it to her because she said the shake was making her cold and she wanted something “cozy.” That’s code for my scarf, I’ve learned.

The kids also got to taste the Cotton Candy Milkshake, which I could barely photograph before their grubby little hands got in the way.

Yep, there’s rock candy, gum balls and a huge ass lollipop shoved inside. Pretty much Mazzy’s (or any kid’s) dream come true.

As always, Seri came more prepared than I did and brought gifts for her boys to give the girls. (SERI!!!)

Harlow got a framed pic of her and Luke. She was so pleased with it, I almost died of secondhand cuteness. (When we got home, she displayed it in a prime location on her desk.)

Luke also gave Harlow her very first bouquet of flowers.

I mean, do they look like an old married couple or what?

Gavin got Mazzy a framed pic too.

It was a pic of their first date, of course.

After the gifts, the kids got quickly back to the main task at hand.

I know Seri was the one who actually bought the flowers and helped Gavin and Luke make the gifts, but I bet those Little Miss Party boys are taking notes and going to make great boyfriends to some very special people (maybe Mazzy and Harlow?) one day.

Before we left, high on sugar and lifelong friendship, Joe Isidori (the owner) popped in and asked if he could get a pic with Harlow to show his wife.

The answer was decidedly, NOPE.

Apparently, even milkshakes piled high with cake and candy can’t make Harlow do anything she doesn’t want to do.

Hope this post makes up for the shun, Joe! I’m sure you’ll have no trouble selling out those Magnolia Bakery shakes on Valentine’s Day.

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If there’s a line at Broome Street, don’t worry, there are four locations in NYC.

Photos taken by @mommyshorts and Janina Santillan.