Jonathan Mann is a musician who writes and performs a new song on his YouTube channel every single day. Recently, he posted a catchy new jingle called “Shitty Shitty Feminist” which discussed his public desire to be a good feminist while also realizing his actions as a husband and father tell a different story.
Jonathan, who is a new dad, admits to putting the majority of the household responsibilities and childcare on his wife, who also *SHOCKER* has a job.
Ummm… I think I may have heard this song before. Or at least this story.
Not ever set to music though.
In his video, Mann covers a lot of same issues many “equal partners” face after they become parents. Whose job is the baby laundry? Who is doing the shopping? Whose turn is it to change a shitty diaper? Who gets to go out for drinks with friends while the other is tethered to the baby via her boob? (Don’t answer that last one.)
Mann admits letting most of these tasks fell to his wife (it was her responsibility while he had a choice whether to participate) and he didn’t even realize he was doing anything wrong until she called him out on it. GOOD FOR HER.
The straw that broke the camel’s back was the time Jonathan went for a run and then called home to ask his wife if he could see a movie after. She said yes (you know, to be the cool wife who doesn’t have her husband on a leash) but was resentful later.
I HAVE SO BEEN THERE.
They decided to balance the inequities by sitting down and mapping out every single task they had to do for both of their jobs, their baby and their shared household. Which sounds like an exercise that would make my brain explode, but how amazing for a couple to see where the gender barriers lie and try to knock ’em down.
Jonathan might be a shitty feminist but he’s a lot less shitty if he’s trying to make changes starting in his very own home.
Does this video resonate with you? Do you and your spouse say you’re equal partners but the real division of responsibilities is not as balanced as you would like?