A couple of weeks ago, I posted about Mazzy and Harlow’s new back-to-school clothes from Mini Boden. Which are so adorable, I can’t imagine they will ever look back at old photos of themselves and think— OH MY GOD, MOM!!!! HOW DID YOU LET ME LEAVE THE HOUSE LIKE THAT?


“I’m so embarrassed by my sequined Peter Pan color!”




“You let me accessorize with GOLD? So déclassé.”

But you never know, because back in Middle School, I thought socks pulled up over my jeans were the height of fashion, body suits were appropriate under overalls and sweaters could only be worn if they were big enough to reach my knees.

Here are 49 old school fashion rules from the ’80s and ’90s:

1. fanny packs were mandatory on field trips

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2. your Top Gun bomber jacket should never be taken off

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3. neon color blocking could only be complete with matching socks

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4. Mr. T counted as a fashion statement

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5. denim skirts fell below the knee

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6. a mini boom box was the best accessory

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7. Roller blades were an acceptable shoe substitute

Meg Nedostup Yaniglos‎3

8. t-shirts tucked into drawstring shorts were only slightly more on trend than floral overalls

Brighid Uddyback‎

9. gender neutral meant wearing a tie necklace

Julie Balke Shanks‎ 2

10. It was cool to rock matching crop tops

Maddie Rothman Sidorov

11. there was no difference between day outfits and pajamas

Sarah Brumfield

12. argyle meant you were somebody special

Chandra Dee

13. your denim game could make or break you

Lauren Fender

14. turtlenecks turtlenecks turtlenecks

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15. brothers and sisters could go to the same barber

Heather Perling Blank3

16. acid washed elastic jean shorts were the least of your problems

Kristin Tutt

17. “saved by the bell” was your fashion inspiration


18. your prom dress had sleeves so puffy, it was hard to get through the doors of your gymnasium

Ellen Gale Williams

19. neckties weren’t just for men

Annie Reeder Hawker

20. patches upped your outfit

Teresa Hamm

21. zebra print pants paired perfectly with lion head t-shirts

Jessica Wright Wander

22. your huge glasses could only be upstaged by your mushroom mullet

Rosie Dundin Deterding 14 hrs ·

23. raggedy ann was a style choice

Amy Blakemore

24. heathers was a way of life

Ginger Hicks Deel

25. tubes of paint made an awesome pattern

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26. clothing could  be embellished with puffy paint

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27. suspenders were preferrable to belts

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28. clashing with your friend’s floral pattern was a real concern

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29. track suits had to be adidas (and telephones had to have a cord)

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30. elastic should always be on the ankles of your favorite bugle boy jeans

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31. a bow headband could be accentuated with a popped collar

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32. a Tamagotchi safely secured around your neck was better than jewelry

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33. the bigger the bow, the better

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34. white blazers went nicely with a can of Aquanet

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35. your outfit had to prove your commitment to new kids on the block

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36. jam shorts were perfect attire at sea world

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37. your floral vest could only be overshadowed by your dad’s porn ‘stache

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38. your bangs were bigger than your blazer

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39. scrunchis had to be directly on top of your head

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40. your crimper got more use than your diffuser

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41. necklaces should be two charms away from not being able to lift your head

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42. bulky patterned sweaters weren’t worn ironically

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43. snowsuits should be so big, you could barely move your arms and legs

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44. you took all your fashion cues from Janet Jackson

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45. sweaters were three dimensional


46. outfits revolved around your favorite hightops


47. “rock the Half up side pony” was your mission statement

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48. floral could be worn in the form of a jumpsuit (even if it meant you needed help from an adult to go to the bathroom)

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49. geometric patterns were the only way to make the cover of Teen Beat

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Thanks to everyone who submitted photos of their favorite/most embarrassing outfits from when they were young!

Unfortunately, there could only be one winner, selected at random from all the submissions on facebook and instagram. That winner is….

saddle shoes paired well with strawberry shortcake

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Congratulations! Your embarrassing school fashion just earned you a $500 Boden USA gift card to spend on yourself or your kids.

There were three runner-ups picked at random to receive a $50 Boden USA gift card. They are:

knee socks should be pulled up as much as possible

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the only thing bigger than your buttons were your shoulder pads

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denim shirts were practically dresses


Please contact abby@mommyshorts.com to claim your Boden USA gift cards.

If you didn’t win, you can still click on the graphic below to receive an automatic 15% off your entire Mini Boden purchase plus free shipping.


Hopefully, your sense of style has improved since the ’80s and ’90s but even if it hasn’t, you really can’t go wrong with anything on the Boden site. All their clothes are well-made and comfortable with classic looks that never go out of style.





And that’s coming from someone who wore a lavender Members Only Jacket once upon a time.


This post was sponsored by Mini Boden, but all horrible outfits are your own.