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Do you know the Disney Collector? You know, the YouTube videos your toddler will watch for five hours at a time while some faceless Russian lady opens mystery eggs and explains princess accessories in excruciating detail while talking verrrrrrry sloooooooooooowly?

Yes, THAT Disney Collector.

Do you know Disney Collector has over 3 billion views and is currently the 3rd most viewed YouTube channel? I don’t know how many dollars that translates into but one thing is for sure— this woman isn’t just annoying, she is an annoyingly loaded GENIUS.

Check out this parody of the Disney Collector from “What’s Up Moms“. Elle does on spot-on imitation of the woman moms love to hate. I mean, just hate to hate. THERE IS NO LOVE.

Except if we need to hop in the shower. Then that thirty-five minutes of egg unwrapping is MAGIC.

FYI: I’ve caught Harlow watching Disney Collector on more than one occasion, but Mazzy is more a fan of DisneyCarToys, who I believe is the 4th most popular YouTube channel. That’s the one who uses Frozen dolls to act out “wholesome” fan fiction, which seemed innocent enough until the video where Kristoff gets “snot” all over Anna’s face after a night in bed together. Too much SNEEZING, I guess.

I should clarify— DisneyCarToys used to be the 4th most popular channel until I banned Mazzy from watching DisneyCarToys ever again and her views plummeted by about four million a day.

Sorry, DisneyCarToys, if the loss of Mazzy led you to home foreclosure or anything.

Maybe next time, you will rethink your “wholesome” plot lines.


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