There are two evil babies left in the competition. By Monday, only one will remain standing.
Or lying down, depending on whether it is nap time.
Caitlyn and Liam might be the two most evil babies we have ever had in the glare-off. They are both deserving of a spot in the finals and I think for many— this is who they hoped to see here all along.
Who will ultimately prevail? That is all up to you guys…
Which baby would freeze Elsa’s heart?
Which baby would step on a crack to break her mother’s back?
Which baby’s mirror is scared to look at them?
Which baby taught Chucky everything he knows?
If looks could kill, which baby would be the suspect?
Which baby keeps Cujo as his pet?
Which baby loves his mom more than Norman Bates?
Which baby eats Hannibal Lector for breakfast?
Which baby would bitch slap another kid for touching his toys?
Which baby would overflow their diaper just to laugh at you?
Which baby gives Stephen King new book ideas?
Which baby’s first word was “Voldemort”?
Which baby will you be dressing up as for Halloween?
Which baby would come crawling out of your TV screen seven days after watching the video?
Which baby is the next character on American Horror Story?
Which baby went straight from the maternity ward to the mental health ward?
Which baby would you see in the hallways of the Hotel Overlook?
Which baby would make your ovaries shrivel up?
Which baby personalized her bunting with the letters R-E-D-R-U-M?
Polls will be open all weekend and close Sunday night at 8pm EST. You can vote once a day.
May the evilest baby win!
GIVEAWAY
Today’s giveaway is a $100 gift card to Ladida, an online shop (and actual shop in New Jersey) of ridiculously chic clothes for babies, girls and boys.
Shop owner Rebecca Weitz combs through dozens of lookbooks every year to find the absolute best pieces of clothing from children’s brands both at home and abroad. Ladida sells a mix of traditional and cutting-edge kid’s fashion from brands like Anaïs & I, Bonton, Little Remix, nununu, Junior Gaultier and more.
A stellar wardrobe will do any baby a service, but I think it should be of particular interest to Caitlyn and Liam. Obviously, it is hard to spot an evil glare when it’s wearing a Marni Yellow Pleated Jumper or a Bellerose Colorblock Cardigan.
GIVEAWAY RULES
1) You must be a Mommy Shorts Facebook Fan or subscriber to enter. Then, because we’ve been talking about evil babies all week long, let’s turn the table and talk about evil parents.
Please confess your most recent bad parenting moment in the comment section below.
All giveaway winners will be announced on Monday October 27th, along with the winner of the glare-off.
I let the 1 1/2 year old ride in the stroller one time! She fell out while throwing a fit one driveway away from our home. She landed on her forehead. She has since ended up in the hospital something completely unrelated. It’s So much fun reliving that story a few times a day.
Hi! My 8 month old fell off our bed onto the hardwood floor because he can only fall asleep on me and I forgot to surround him with pillows!!
Total mother of the year award goes to me!! Not!!
My 14 month old will pick up the dog chew bones and play with them….and sometimes put them in her mouth. And when I’m really tired….I let her.
Sometimes when my daughter is whining in the car, I just turn up the music and stop listening. It’s not like responding to her will calm her down anyway.
I am all sorts of bad this week. Abby had a mild cough on Wednesday and I let her stay home mainly because I was sore from a workout and didn’t want to get dressed and take her. Eeeek.
When I’m tired and need a moment, I will throw a handful of goldfish onto the playroom floor for a “super fun scavenger hunt game”
Hahahahaha
love this idea!!
I have a 6 month old. First time mom here. When she was just a month or two I was holding her and she spit up bad. She had never really spit up before and I was so startled about it, I dropped her onto my lap. She was okay thankfully but I felt like the worst parent ever.
Most recent? We lost our son at Disney World! Luckily for just a short while. We were waiting in line for Winnie-the-Pooh. I was watching my daughter in the play area, while my husband and son (or so I thought) waited in line. All of a sudden my husband asks if I know where son is. “No! I thought you were watching him!” Frantic searching and calling ensues. Turns out he had cut his way to the front of the line.
Worst – a few years ago my 2-year-old needed blood drawn. On the way to the site, I offered him a snack and told him he had to put his lovey in the basket under the stroller. He reluctantly gave it up and I tucked it under the stroller. We arrive at the site where he’s about to have needles stuck into his arm, and I realize the lovey had fallen out of the stroller. I felt terrible that he was about to be stuck and I had lost his comfort object! Parenting fail.
Last night I was exhausted from my 1 year old twin Cranka-saurouses, but had to get a bunch of things done for a special occasion. They found cardboard party blowers and started running around chewing on them. Currently, they have bad habit of wanting to eat anything paper related. My husband thought we should take it away and I looked over and sighed “let them have it, it’s the most quiet/happy they’ve been all day”. 10 mins later we realized over 1/2 cardboard part had been consumed for both.
I rationalized that maybe they needed more fiber…
I learned that the PBS kids app on my kindle will play hours and hours and hours of Wild Kratts clips while I nap.
I let my infant have wedding cake so he would be quiet while I ate my piece.
We were at a birthday party for a friend’s son. Our son was particularly cranky that we wouldn’t let him (1 1/2 years old) play at the top of a really steep hill. We decided to let him swing in the birthday boy’s swing, but the straps were adjust too small and we were going to be right there pushing the swing, so we didn’t strap him in. Something happened my husband and I both looked away, a little girl who was “helping” kept pushing the swing, and our son leaned forward (probably to try and see what we were looking at) and fell out. He did bite his lip but was all better after getting a popsicle. I on the other hand felt like the worst person ever.
i let my 3yo daughter have the ipad for a couple of hours just so i can have breakfast, cook the day’s meals, nurse her 3.5 month old baby brother without her pinching his cheeks and knocking on his head every 2 minutes.
At his first pediatrician visit, I turned my back on the baby while he was on the examination table to get his clothes from my husband. The pediatrician scolded me for doing it and said I may not have “the careful gene”. After crying all the way home (new mommy hormones), I know to never do that again…geez!
It’s called the “I’m not sleeping right now” gene and the doc should know that! Don’t feel bad. I’d hazard a guess that at least 80% of all babies fall off a bed height or higher in the first year. 🙂
Most recent was letting my 2 yr old eat ice cream for lunch. Her sleep schedule has been off for the past month and I was desperate to get her to take a real nap. She had refused any sort of nutritious lunch and was just in a mood. Finally I told her if she took a good nap she could have some ice cream. She napped and immediately upon waking requested her ice cream. This was not my first bribe to get her to nap lately.
My 1.5 year old daughter is obsessed with the moon. She wants to see it every.single.night before she goes to bed. This causes a problem when the moon isn’t visible. I found the perfect spot on our front steps, when you look through the tree and see the streetlight, it greatly resembles the actual moon. We look at that “moon” more than I want to admit.
My 9 month old was chewing on what I thought was his teething ring. Turned out to be our mini dachshund’s bully stick (aka shriveled up bull penis). Ugh!
We have a motion-sensor skeleton in the house that I randomly turn on. To be fair, my husband and I often forget that it’s on and it ends up freaking us out as much as my 2.5 year old.
My children’s pet ferret escaped from the house and got ran over when they were small. I told them he ran away and was living in the woods. Five years later they still ask how I think he made it and I still feed the lie even though they are old enough to understand.
It was a gorgeous day, but I told my 3-yr-old twins the park was closed. Instead, I let them watch tv all day while I took a nap with the baby.
We spend almost the entire day yesterday on electronics because I was just having a CANNOT DEAL day and she had gotten her Legos taken away for not cleaning them up. Yesterday SUCKED, but today is going much better.
Holding DD and walking out of the bathroom…totally misjudged the room and slammed her head into the door frame. Luckily she was fine, but I felt horrible about thay welt!
You know – I’m not sure where I went wrong. But I must have done something evil. Last year, when my daughter was 4, she wanted to be Tinkerbell for Halloween. Now, at 5, she wants to be… a zombie. They don’t even MAKE zombie costumes for 5 year olds!
super easy zombie costume for a little girl take a mans white under shirt tatter the fudge out of it and roll it in the dirt. then you can throw it over warmer clothes and have a cute costume.
Yeah – LOL – I should have specified. She wants to be a really girly zombie – she hates black and gray and dirt. Not sure what colors she thinks zombies usually dress in after they dig themselves out of their graves. I got her a Monster High costume – close enough. It’s actually a ghost character but…it was on sale.
forgetting on more than one occasion to feed my poor middle child lunch…
Last night at 7:00 the kids were getting on my nerves. I told them (10, 8, and 6 yrs old) that it was 8:30 and time for bed. They don’t have clocks. They didn’t know it was 7:00. They went to sleep and I didn’t feel guilty at all…I ate ice cream and chocolate peanut butter filled teddy bears.
most recent fail was monday, I was going on a day trip downtown with my mom and 1 year old son. We get downtown and I realized I forgot to pack extra clothes for him and he had a over full diaper that had leaked on his pants and there were no store near by to pick up a new pair so I wrapped him in my jacket and took his pants in the ladies room and used the automatic hair dryer to dry his pants and get thru the day. I felt awful!
I informed my eleven year old who happens to be 5′ 4″ and wearing a ladies size 10 shoe these days that she needs to stop dressing like a tramp because I would prefer not to be a grandmother in the next 10 years. While the intent was good, my execution was a gigantic fail. Sigh.
In the early morning, my DD 3 watches TV while I sleep on the couch. My DS 11 mos goes to bed late and sleeps in longer than her!
I was at rite aid with my daughter Rosalee. While standing in line Rose starts asking me to buy stuff, so I asked her why she doesn’t use her own money, she said (loud of course) “well I would have my own money, but Daddy took my tooth fairy money so he could buy cigarettes”
I have 2 daughters and 1 son. Youngest is 7. So we are moving and our son says he is going to sleep in the bed with my husband. So my husband says no, you are going to sleep in your own bed, me and mommy will share a bed. So then my husband randomly says, well I think I want to have another baby, he asks the kids if they want a boy or girl. They all start talking about a new baby as if it is really going to happen. So I say, well what if we have a new baby and she ends up like Rosalee??? (Rosalee is our problem child) the whole room got quiet…..haha shut them down! No more new baby talk haha….!!!
Sometimes I grab my laptop, hide from my 2 year old, and binge watch Gossip Girl while she wanders around the house yelling MOM! Where are you?!? I just giggle.
I curse in front of my kid… A lot… When i hit the brakes too hard when he is in the car he now yells “dammit, what the hell?”
Once, while waiting on sushi takeout, I put our daughter in the stroller and proceeded to push her down the two stairs to the street. She wasn’t buckled in and went flying in the street at the feet of some French people (we were living in France) who looked HORRIFIED! I just know they were saying, “Stupid Americans!” That day we learned to never forget the seat belt!
I bribe my son to eat his dinner and get dressed with M&Ms and gummy vitamins which I have told him are candy!
Too funny, I told my kids their vita bears are candy too! They have not have a real gummy bear as of today.
Duke dropped his floss stick in the bathtub (where I was letting them floss, naturally) and then I just scooped it up and made him keep flossing. That’s gross, right?
I also snapped at him the other day because he didn’t instantly respond to my request to put on his shoes and instead insisted he wanted to play with his rocket. I was apparently so mean about, “I’m gonna take away that rocket!” that ten minutes later, he asked me in the car, “Why you angry for me, Mama?” in this little sad voice. #motheroftheyear
I put the 2 month old in the stroller to go for our nightly walk. I turned around to grab the doggy baggies from the garage but had forgotten to put on the stroller brakes. When I turned around she was already halfway down the driveway and picking up speed. The stroller flew into the street and tipped over. Luckily the carseat handle hit the ground. I was running and screaming like a lunatic. When I got to the stroller and picked it up….she was still sound asleep (never the wiser). My neighbors however, saw the entire fiasco.
Most recent? Ok. My three year-old’s dinner on Tuesday night consisted of Reese’s Puffs cereal, a slice of American cheese, and a handful of Goldfish crackers. ::shrug::: She was picky and I was tired.
We were shopping for my daughter an outfit, I let my one year old down to walk around because she was throwing a fit. I was looking at shoes when I noticed my little one was gone. She had crawled under the dressing room door. We had to convince her to crawl back out. Luckily no one was in there trying on clothes!
I’m kind of unsympathetic when my kids have stomach viruses. I do NOT want to catch it, so I keep them at arm’s length (usually further). There’s no snuggle-until-you-feel-better in our house.
Sharing utensils with my daughter while I have a cold this week. It’s just easier and she already has a stuffy nose. I know this is horrible logic but she always wants to eat off my plate.
Besides using Disney junior as a bay sitter since the baby has come…
when my 3 yr old was a little less than two we were on the back deck. He was riding his little mater ride on toy and I was reading my book with my feet up. Next thing I know I see him go tumbling down the steps…all all 6 of them. I jumped up and ran to my screaming little boy and picked him up. Surprisingly he just had a small knot on his forehead under his hair line. I didn’t tell my husband about it til he felt the knot.
We were having a horrid morning, and I ended up sending my son to his room to sit on his bed. While he was in there, I atecookies and had a glass of wine. ( and I still don’t feel guilty!)
My 6 year old wanted his friend to come over for a play date and my house was a disaster. I really didn’t feel like going on a cleaning frenzy for some other 6 year old who’s mother was probably going to come in for a bit and I would have been completely mortified if she did. I lied (white lie) and told my son that I had called and there was no answer but I left a message. I called my girlfriend and had her call the house back in 30 minutes and I faked it that it was his friends mother and told my son that they were going to his grandmothers house for dinner. Completely avoided the play date so that I didn’t have to clean.
Twice (so far) this week, my 9-month-old has found cat vomit before I did. Shortly after cleaning him up (and the floor, of course) the first time, apparently I was again distracted enough to let him get to the cat water fountain and give himself a bath. On the bright side, once over the initial shock of the chilly flood, he enjoyed splashing around in it while I figured out how to tackle cleaning up a gallon of water!
Sometimes my 2 yo will get a hold of my diet coke. He likes to open the lid and play with the ice (and drink it). Sometimes let him just for the 10 minutes of peace it gives me.
I bumped my 2-week old baby’s head on the doorjam as I was walking through it. He cried. A lot. 🙁
I needed some liquor for birthday drinks last weekend and was going to wait to hit the liquor shop until after the kids went to Mimi’s for the weekend, but it was right there and I didn’t want to fight traffic later, so I pulled in, put on ‘Frozen’ and told the eldest child to watch her 1 year old brother while mommy went into the store for a minute…kids in the car while mom is in the liquor store, I know. I am filled with shame.
My 3.5 year old was having a full-on uncontrollable tantrum and after about 45 minutes of her screaming at the top of her lungs I did the same to show her how annoying it was. It stopped her for two seconds but she resumed the tantrum, to which I yelled “WHAT DO YOU WANT?!” and she replied, sobbing: “a hug.” Mother of the Year.
When my daughter, now 15, was 4 she let herself and our 2 dogs out of the house while I was napping on the couch. I woke up to the local police knocking on my door. She had my car keys and told the officers she was going to go to grandmas house. Apparently she and the dogs were on the street in front of the house (thank goodness its not a busy road) and the dogs would not allow the neighbors near her. I assured the officers that the doors had been locked and I had no idea how she got out. We had a deadbolt high up on the door that had a button you had to slide over, hold down and turn the knob to unlock. She was very proud of herself and had no problem showing the officers how she pushed a chair over and operated the deadbolt no problem. She got a stern talking to about not going outside without her parents, and I got a stern warning about keeping her in the house. I felt like the worst mom in the world!!
My 2 year old likes to sit in the grown up chairs. She was sitting at the table eating her yogurt and I went to throw something in the trash. Next thing I know she is screaming bloody murder and bleeding profusely from her mouth because she stood up in the chair and tipped it over. She slammed her chin into the floor and bit a chunk out of her lip.
Very frazzled after a full day of work and trying to hurry and pack for a camping trip I gave my 8 the tang mix to make drinks for himself and my 6 yr old and 2 yr old grandkids. We were well into the woods when the ‘tang’ (read orange flavored fiber drink I had put into an empty tang container months ago) finally kicked in and everyone spent HOURS pooping EVERYWHERE. Poor park ranger that tried to help us will probably never choose to have kids after that…….
After a bath, freshly lotioned, smelling sweet, my 2 year old daughter went to her room to play. Not too long after she returned with a finger painting on her tummy. That’s weird, where did she get the paint…oh that’s not paint. It is poop! I start yelling” f*#k over and over as I cleaned poop off of her torso, fingernails, arms…You get the idea. We were both crying, then she started to say f*#k. I said, “you don’t say f*#k!” Her response was, “yes, I say f*#k!” Ohhh what a morning!
My girls already think Santa isn’t coming this year because I’ve told them that like a million times when they’re being bad/whiny/demanding/loud/annoying etc… Santa will still come but they basically think he hates them.
I kept my daughter up a little past her bedtime so I could finish watching the world series game.
Caitlyn is the sweetest girl in the world. ..but this is her look. If she disagrees, dislikes, maybe yes, maybe no…she is consistent. If she’s known you for a million years or a million minutes, she treats everyone the same. It is the reason why I adore her. XOXO
The day a rogue wave swept through our beach camp and mom of the year, that would be me, saves the towel and leaves her 18 month old to fend for herself. The f*ing towel! Thankfully a friend of mine sitting next to us grabbed my child, along with her 2 children. 3 years later and I still wonder where my maternal instincts were during that moment…
Not sure where I went wrong. My 8 yr old little girl was chatting about getting a boyfriend during dinner, so, teasingly I ask her why she would want a boyfriend!? Her serious as can be reply…”so we can have sex and make a baby. “…come again, WTH!
My 1-year-old screamed for 15-minutes straight on our flight home from Orlando last night. The man next to me gave me dirty looks for 15-minutes straight.
Carrying my little guy and walking around the corner in the hall…THUNK…oops so sorry baby! But my real response to him? Maybe you shouldn’t tip your head back so far :/
Our 11 month old has been practicing going up stairs. She was so excited hat she sat down two steps up… And fell backwards to land right in her forehead.
Oops.
My daughter skipped to the front of the line the other day while waiting to get a turn in the jumpy house. Not one kid noticed or said anything! By the time I noticed she was being called for her turn! I didn’t say a thing.
When my three year old wakes up ‘too early’ I set her up with Dora on Netflix and continue sleeping while she watches uninterrupted episodes…
Besides moving the breakfast cereal to a shelf the 3 yr old can reach, we recently brought her little brother home. On the day my husband went back to work, he came home to everyone in the house crying. New baby, big sister, Momma – even the dog! Transitioning from 1 to 2 kids is tough.
I sent my 10 year old into the bathroom with a shoe to kill a bug when his Dad wasn’t home to take care it!!!
I may or may not have left my baby sitting in a blowout filled diaper and onsie until his daddy discovered it!
I watch my 7 month old niece and she loves the IKEA catalog! Sometimes when I need to get stuff done in the kitchen I give her the catalog and when I hear gagging I go back to the living room and pull paper out of her mouth and leave her the catalog to so it again!
We were at an out of town wedding and my son and husband were in the bathroom to our hotel room and I opened the door forcefully while my one year olds hand was under it and smashed his fingers. It wasn’t pretty. 🙁
Let her cry while I ran to get the camera to get a picture of her leg stuck in the crib because I thought it was funny
I’ve kept my ear infection prone kid home (without pay for me because I’m out of sick days) to respect daycare’s fever policy while others are allowed to break the rule constantly. Last week he had a low fever and I had work obligations, so pumped him full of ibuprofen and took him in …
I consider myself a very capable driver, but I have low tolerance for other drivers who are completely incompetent. When others do something stupid, like cut me off or drive recklessly, I used to give them a certain gesture with my hand. Notice I said ‘used’ to.
My daughter, apparently, had picked up my habit. My husband had to follow us in to the car dealership once. He said the entire way, he’d see her little hand pop up in the air, middle finger proudly displayed, every time I would hit the brakes. When asked, she told me she was dealing with ‘incompetent’ drivers for me.
Needless to say, I don’t flip people off anymore.
My daughter (8) fell spectacularly from a swing. She’s a true drama queen so I let her hug it out with me for over ten minutes then thought she’d actually hurt it because she was still quite teary. Ran over from the park to the supermarket to grab some frozen peas to put on it and sooth it. She basically stopped crying but said it did still hurt. I then took her to her violin lesson thinking distraction therapy might be the key. She wined the whole lesson that it still quite hurt but said she could still play. After which I thought, strange that it still hurts. So I took her to the hospital where I work as a theatre nurse! In the waiting room she made friends, ran around, had a ball. When after the Xray the doc came out and said it was broken I basically yelled WHAT? She (dr) laughed and said she also had thought it was not broken…. Mother of the year.
I totally let my two year old stay up until 10 pm last night in the hopes she’d sleep in this morning, and completely forgot we had an appointment early today. I had to wake her up, and she was NOT HAPPY with me!
Last week my 2 1/2 yr old was extremely sick with Hand, Foot and Mouth virus which causes blisters in and around her mouth. She was still a passive user but the sores were too painful for her to suck her passive. While she was sick and not able to use them, I got rid of them. I’ve been too chicken to take away the passive before now. When she got well and asked for her pasdie back, I told her it was covered with sickness and virus and we had to get rid of them. So far, its worked.
I left the spare outfits in the car trying to lighten the diaper bag a bit the other day at library story time. Naturally as soon as the librarian got started one of my 23mo twins wet out of her diaper. Not wanting to deprive the girls of their outing I changed the diaper and let my daughter finish the hour in just her diaper: )
Oh my this is so funny. Such sweetness yet so evil.
On Tuesday, I was attempting to get myself ready for work, along with my 3.5 year old and my 18 month old. My husband works shifts so some mornings, I’m all on my own for the morning daycare routine and those mornings are ROUGH. I had finally finished convincing both kids that yes, they must wear pants and I was contemplating what to do with the tangled rats nest attached to my head when I sighed. My 3.5 year old son asked me “What’s wrong Mama?” and without thinking I replied “Oh nothing. Mama’s hair just looks like crap”. He has spent the rest of the week sighing dramatically and saying “my hair looks like CRAP”. Parenting fail.
when my son was two months old, while i was changing his diaper on a foldout changing station in a restaurant washroom, he peed all over me, himself, and his clothes. Of course the paper towels were on the opposite side of the room, out of my reach. I snapped the safety belt over him so that I could leave him to grab some towels. He immediately started screaming, but I thought it was because I had left him on his own. He continued to cry as I cleaned him up. It wasn’t until I unsnapped him to get him dressed again, that I realized I had accidentally pinched part of his belly skin in the snap. I still feel horrible and guilty to this day. It happened 4 years ago.
My baby daughter was standing on my lap at the dinner table one night and decided to throw her face forward. I laughed. Then I looked. She had blood dripping out of her mouth. Oops.
I frequently fib to my kids about the batteries being out of charge rather than letting them use the iPad or my phone. 🙁
[…] Friday’s Finals: I asked everyone to confess their most evil parenting moment. I think Katie’s takes the cake… […]
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