Two weeks ago, I wrote a post called “22 Things I Want My Daughters to Know in 22 Years” to promote the 22 year lifespan of an ENERGY STAR certified LED bulb.
Then I asked everyone to submit their own advice they’d like their kids to know when they reach their twenties. The comments were filled with so many great nuggets, I wanted to share my favorites today. Some I’ve heard before and some are brand new, but almost all feel relevant even now, when I am supposedly an adult.
1. Don’t be too critical. Things you swore you’d never do as a hip 22 year-old, I guarantee you will do at least once in your life. Like leaving the house without make up or driving a mini van. Stay humble and show a little grace, your time will come. -Abby
2. Be independent but don’t forget to lean on loved ones when you need them. – Angelia
3. Don’t tell your problems to anyone other than your closest friends and family…20% don’t care and the other 80% are glad you have them. – Debbie
4. It is more than ok to say no sometimes. It is also OK to give in on occasion. Choosing your battles does not mean you are selling out or being a door mat. It just means you know when you need to stand up and when it’s OK to sit out a round. – Suzy
5. Don’t try to change the person you love. They will not change. If you can’t live with it, move on. – Krystal
6. Never judge others too quickly. Some of the best people make the worst first impressions, while some of the meanest people make great first impressions. Know a person a little before writing them off or letting them in. – Ashley
7. Be kind. Everyone you meet struggles. The world would be a better place if we all just showed some compassion towards each other. – Heather
8. Never let someone mistake your politeness and kindness as an invitation to be walked all over. You have to stand up for yourself when the time is right. – Dawn
9. Don’t waste your time trying to be what you think others think you should be. If you’re trying too hard to impress and persuade people to be your friend, then they probably aren’t worth it. – Allison
10. Take time to put down the tech and enjoy the world around you. Spend more time on your IRL relationships than your online ones. – Kande
11. Stop saying “I’m sorry!” all the time— women do this and it just makes us look weak. We are NOT responsible for every. single. thing. that goes wrong in any given day! – Tara
12. It’s okay to make mistakes. It’s how we learn, rather than just being told. Plus, the lessons stick much much better that way. – Jenny
13. Don’t waste all your spare money on drinks and clothes. Put some of it into savings, so you’re not playing catch up when you have a child of your own. – Marissa
14. Since I have all boys, Ill say, learn to cook and clean for yourself. And if your wife is a SAHM, never, ever, ever come home and ask what she did all day or insinuate that she does nothing while you bust your rear. She does so much more than you can imagine. – Lizzie
15. Don’t worry; no one can fold a fitted sheet. – Jill
16. It’s okay to ask for directions. Don’t wait until you’re halfway to mainland China to admit that you took the wrong train. In life, as in travel, it’s okay to admit you’re lost. – Maria
17. Be nice to other girls/women and give them the benefit of the doubt. When you meet one of your guy friends’ girlfriends, kill her with kindness. When you see a gorgeous woman, tell her you love her bag instead of knee-jerking to hate her. When there’s a new girl at work, invite her to lunch. The world is a much better place when women are good to each other. – Natasha
18. You never have to be completely defined, done, finished. You can always change and evolve into someone new. – LJ
19. Be comfortable being alone. – Mickey
20. Never stop trying new things. If you can’t find any new foods, languages, books, or hobbies to try then you’re either in a coma or not trying hard enough. – Hope
21. As you become an adult, you will see strong, intelligent, driven, respectable people make major life decisions—career, marriage, if/when to have a baby— based heavily on fear, mainly of the unknown, or fear of doing something outside the box. These people may make you second guess your own decisions, when you decide to be brave. Do not second guess. The fear is bigger than the wolf. Dreaming big is torture if you do not allow yourself to act big. – Lindsey
22. Always say “I love you” before hanging up the phone with your parents, no matter how irked they’ve made you. You never know when you won’t hear it back. That’s my biggest regret. – Victoria
You guys are so wise.
Congratulations to Victoria, who wrote #22, my favorite comment. I will be awarding her a $250 gift card from Home Depot, and a pack of five ENERGY STAR certified LED bulbs from Philips, which will save you about $400 in energy bills over their lifetime.
If every household switched just one bulb to an ENERGY STAR certified bulb, we would save enough energy to light two million homes for a whole year, save $460 million in annual energy costs and prevent six billion pounds of greenhouse gas emissions, equivalent to that of 550,000 cars.
You might want to pass on that bit of knowledge to your kids too.
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This post was sponsored by ENERGY STAR. To learn more about ENERGY STAR certified LED bulbs, click here.
Thank you so much! I loved reading through all of the advice in the comments on the original post. Everything was perfect, and there were many things I wish I would have been told growing up, that I’ll pass along to my kids. Thank you!
Love #15, but these are all great!
Printing this out! Would make for some great dinnertime discussions.
I’d expand on #22–I close every phone call with my hubby, my parents and my grandmother with “I love you” for the same reasons. I plan on doing it with my children when they’re old enough to talk. 🙂 I never want to feel like they didn’t hear it enough from me. I don’t “love” many people, but the ones I do love hear it from me often.
Please please make this and the original post into a book. I will buy it for every female I know.
I love this… I think I’m going to write a couple of them on my bathroom mirror to remind myself of too… (even though I’m way beyond being 22 – ha ha).
I am big on #22, and a lot of these. If I could add anything, it would be to never take anything personally. If someone acts out towards you, it isn’t necessarily you that made them react harshly, it’s the root of the problem, or it could be a problem they suffer with internally.
May I add a 23rd one? : when you are looking for a mate, make a list of all the things that you would like ; then make a list of all the things that you would rather not have to live with. THEN, look over the first list and pick out all the items that you ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE; do the same thing with the second list and pick out whatever you ABSOLUTELY CANNOT TOLERATE. Let the two pared down lists be your guide – everything else is negotiable. And once you have found the right one, tell and show him/her your love often! marriage is a 2 way street where each gives at least 120% to the other.
Victoria’s hit me the most too. I include my kids and husband in that as well. Always end with “I love you”.
Amen, Marissa!!
Love all the advice, thanks for the post!
This is so amazing! I might print and save for when my daughters are older.
Wow these are all great! Particularly love #6, it’s something I need to work on.
Don’t waste time on gossip or people who do. Have friends that are positive and celebrate who you are and all your achievements. Be happy for each other. Help each other be the best your can be. Never be jealous. It is not true. Know that I am always proud you not for your accomplishments but for who you are and I want more than anything for you to always love yourself as much as I love you. Enjoy each day
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