This photo was submitted to me by Sarah (@shreinhart on Instagram) who's two-year-old son Oscar has a nose picking problem.
Sarah believes her son's problem started when she left him watching Handy Manny to nurse his six-week-old sister in a nearby room. Sarah noticed he was being super quiet but falsely assumed it was because Manny was a good temporary sitter.
Little did Sarah know that Oscar's silence was due to something much more sinister—
NOSE PICKING!!!!!
Sarah describes how the discovery went down…
Then Oscar found me and said, "Come look, Mommy. I PAINTED." So 'come look' I did and HOLYF*CKINGSH*T!!!!
That's right, folks. Oscar sat on that couch and stuck his finger up his nose. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT????
Or perhaps, Sarah is referring to the Oscar's OTHER MASTERPIECE.
Nah. Who wouldn't want that work of art on their white leather couch? Brightens up the place, don't you think?
I think this photo is in need of a caption. Please give it your best shot in the comment section below. I'll be collecting entries here and on facebook. Winner gets bragging rights and their very own Mommy Shorts mug!
Mommy Shorts mugs can hold 8oz of liquid and if you hold it upright, it won't even spill! Fill it with coffee and the Mommy Shorts mug has the power to keep you awake. Spike your coffee with vodka and the Mommy Shorts mug has the power to make you forget you're the mother of a child who likes to draw all over your white leather couch. It's an amazing thing, the Mommy Shorts mug! Anybody can purchase one by clicking here.
I'll announce the winner on Friday.
Good luck!
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If you'd like to submit a funny baby photo, please post it on the Mommy Shorts facebook page or @mommyshorts on Instagram.
‘I like your trees but they are so yesterday. I drew this masterpiece for you to frame instead.’
I told you it was just a minor writer’s block, but I got over it!
“Oh, crud. I forgot which I was trying to hide and which was the diversion.”
i don’t always pick my nose, but when i do, i like to pretend i’m picasso.
Masterpiece – done. Time to get comfortable.
Hmmm….what should I do now?
Oscar in his studio… “I’m working in two mediums these days: markers and snot.”
“Oh, hey….what’s for dinner?”
“What?…it helps me hone my craft!”
I stopped picking my nose long enough to draw you this picture mommy!
“Hold on, I’m not quite done”
Pulls out bogger & smears it on couch
“Now my masterpiece is complete. It’s mixed media.”
“The walls are white, the couch is white, the art is black and white, the rug is grey and white…don’t you think we needed some color? And if you just hold on a minute, I’m working on the green and yellow now.”
“Hey, look on the bright side, at least I didn’t finger paint.”
I told you to buy the good washable markers Jonah’s mama buys.
Having a sister rocks! I can do whatever the snot I want whenever she eats!
Hmm…I think it’s missing something. Oh, yep, there it is!
Hey Mom! I Pollocked the couch just in time for dessert!
“What…I was just drawing the map to the hidden treasure.”
Lol Meg! Love your comment
Yes. I’m an asshole. Can we move on now?
…”What? It helps me concentrate on my art! Clearly I have the talent to really color outside the lines”
“Deal with it.”
The next pick-asso. (Picasso)
can you spot the little bastard in this picture?
Just a sec! I’m going to sign it!
Now for the finishing touch….
“And on the seventh day Oscar finished his work which he had made, and he rested…”
Hold on…I’m about to put the cherry on top!
“There. Now Mommy will never notice the booger I wiped on the couch!”
…and this photo is all I have to remember Mom by, shortly after taking it she drove off, never to be seen again. Sure, there were the postcards from South America, but they never had a return address, so that doesn’t really count, does it?”
You can pick your friends.
You can pick your nose.
But you can’t pick when the urge to create will hit you.
Yep, I did it. What ya gonna do about it??
I could find a tissue.
I couldn’t find a tissue.
if you think the couch is a masterpiece, wait until you see what I dig up next!!
Color – done. Next up: Texture.
Green Marker?… not for this masterpiece ~ Its multi-dimensional
It couldn’t have been me. You told me to keep my hands to myself.
My work here is done.
I was really only looking for the green marker, Mom…
Alright, I totaled the couch with my ‘art.’ Now I’ll sit back a watch how she reacts. Careful, Mom, or you will stifle my ‘inner artist’ and scar me for life!
I just threw up – TWICE.
What nobody knows is that Picasso contemplated his masterpieces in exactly the same way…
And now, the reward for a job well done….*ahhhhhh*…
“We need a new red marker.”
I can’t find the green marker.
Can you get me a piece of paper?
“I used all only your favorite colors on the couch! And now I’m picking my favorite.”
ewww… but kinda perfect. lol
I say, is that an uncapped glue stick on the floor?? lol
Mommy don’t close the bathroom door! Imma pick my nose too! Like a Boss!
And the Oscar for creative use of color goes to…envelope please…
My work is complete. Almost.
You can’t punish me. I’m the next Picasso…. See!
Oh this, this is nothing compared to this epic booger I picked for you!!!
Purple, pink, red—look, I KNOW it’s gross. Just give me a sec.
No masterpiece is complete without my signature or DNA.
Hmm…should I tell her I pooped under the cushions, too?
I’m looking for the cap to my red marker…
Payback is a bitch. No one makes Oscar wait for Bubble Guppies. No one.
I learned it by watching Caillou.
As Bob Ross said, “We don’t make mistakes, we have happy accidents.” Ya dig?
Now that is funny!
Someone drew ALL OVER the couch. I would have stopped them but as you can see, I’m busy.
And now all it needs is a little bit of green. Got it!
Nose-picking: it helps boost your creativity.
Wipe this !
I picked some awesome colors to accentuate this room!!!
Maybe if I pick my nose she won’t notice I colored the couch.
Wasn’t me.
Hilarious!
“Look, Mommy! I was practicing my colors! I know them all now! Wait… what color would you call this? :: pulls out booger from nose::”
I’m bored Mom, what can I do now?
‘An artist must be allowed to CREATE! I am working on a new piece called “digging for gold”…..’
Just don’t wipe it on the…COUCH!!!
“What? I saw it on Pinterest…”
Mommy, why do you always say we can never have nice things?
now. what does that dining room table need to make it POP?
No, you colored on the couch and then picked your nose. You.
This has got to be the winner! Nice one meg!
Brainpickings… on the couch. 🙂