I like to think of myself as somewhat of a naming expert. That’s because I was able to pick two names for my girls weird enough so that very few people choose to use them, but not too weird where everyone thinks I’m a monster for giving my children such outlandish names. Others would disagree, of course.
“Mazzy? That’s a nickname, right?”
“No, it’s not.”
“Oh. Why would you name an adorable baby such a strange name?”
That was an actual conversation I had with a woman in an airport when Mazzy was about three months old. A total stranger thought it was okay to criticize my name choice.
NOT COOL, STRANGER.
There are few things that generate as much outrage as poorly named children. Great Aunts, in-laws, next-door neighbors, random Facebook acquaintances you never should have friended in the first place all think it’s perfectly okay to publicly mock, criticize and be a general ass about a parent’s choice of name for their new baby.
I can’t even imagine what it’s like for celebrities, when everyone on earth is waiting to hear about their big mistake.
NORTH WEST???? Are they serious?
MAXWELL DREW? Isn’t it a girl?
BEAR BLAZE??? Did Kate Winslet think she was naming a dog?
BODHI RANSOM??? Did Megan Fox give birth to a movie character from the early nineties?
SUMMER RAIN??? Did Christina Aguilera name a child or a new deodorant scent?
ESMERALDA AMADA??? Are Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes trying to create the next Disney villain?
You know what? Those are all fine names and people should leave poor Megan Fox alone (currently sitting at the top of BabyCenter’s Worst Celebrity Names of 2014). Megan has to deal with people mocking her for marrying David Silver the rest of her life. ISN’T THAT ENOUGH?
Maybe Kim Kardashian saw how Mason and Penelope became the country’s most popular names just by virtue of Kourtney picking them for her kids and wanted to choose something odd so it would stay original. I can’t fault her for that.
The whole reason I named my second child Harlow instead of Harper is because I saw Harper’s popularity rising too dramatically for my taste. In fact, the first thing I checked when BabyCenter came out with their Most Popular Baby Names in 2014 was that Harlow did not make the list.
She did not. PHEW.
I like weird names. I don’t care if they are made up or better suited to pets or common words for fruits and vegetables. I’m not a huge fan of Apple but I have always loved Plum. If not for a first name, than a middle name.
Harlow Plum Wiles. HOW CUTE IS THAT? Mike was not on board.
To me, it seems there are two trends going on at once. There are the people who want to name their kids something original and there are the people who think naming your kid something original is an exercise in narcissism and a huge disservice to your child.
William (as in the future King of England)— now that’s a solid name, they say.
Briar Rose (new daughter of Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen)— old fashioned and beautiful.
Charlie— everybody’s friend!
Wait. Charlie is a girl? Is it short for Charlotte?
No.
Oh, forget it then.
Wouldn’t life be boring if everyone picked a solid well-known moniker? My husband’s name is Michael. Every one of his college friends is also named Michael. I don’t know if the Mikes gravitated together intentionally or not, but that’s what we call them— THE MIKES. We can’t even refer to any of them by name and know who we are talking about.
Now that Mike is out of college, you know who he has to contend with? My brother-in-law. Also named Mike. We call him Mikey to differentiate. Mikey hates it.
Of course, some celebrities take the need for an original baby name too far and chose monikers with the intention of being mocked. I mean, how else do you explain Moxie Crimefighter (daughter of Penn Teller), Audio Science (son of Shannyn Sossamon), and Pilot Inspecktor (son of Jason Lee)? Is it really fair to determine these kids’ lots in life when they are just born? What if Pilot Inspecktor wants to become a librarian? Or Moxie Crimefighter lives her life as a couch potato? What if Tu Morrow (daughter of Jason Morrow) wants to live her life in the present tense?! WHAT THEN?
Not to mention, poor poor kid, I mean Kyd (son of Tea Leoni and David Duchovney).
I get it. It’s fun to make fun of celebrity names, but let’s not pretend any of us are any better at this process than anybody else. You have to get your spouse to agree with your choice for one. That is no easy task.
Just for fun, I tried the Celebrity Baby Name Generator to see how I would have named my baby if I wanted her to land the cover of People magazine.
Not bad. I can dig it. Let’s see what happens if I plug in my husband’s information…
Ugh. It’s a good thing we don’t make millions in Hollywood. This might be grounds for divorce.
In all seriousness, I commend odd choices. I gave my kids weird(ish) names and I come from a long line of weird(ish) names. Ilana was much less common when I was growing up than it is today. My sister’s name is Myriah and this was way before Mariah Carey’s rise to fame. My mom is Adela, pre-Adele. My late grandmother was Minna (nickname Minnie), about ten years before Minnie Mouse.
When I was ten, having an original name was not considered trendy. I wanted a name I could find on one of those rainbow stickers or a big pencil at the airport. But I grew into my name and learned to love it. My name is one of the things that always makes me feel a little bit more interesting. It requires an explanation. I was named after my grandfather Irving— there are not a lot of I-names, you know.
I would like everyone to go on naming their kids original things. Screw the people that think “made-up” names are stupid. Someone was named Sam at one point and it was the first Sam. Maybe Sam was the son of a well-known cobbler, the most famous cobbler in the whole town and everybody thought— who does this cobbler think he is, naming a child SAM??? You can’t just invent names out of thin air!
I say embrace the odd name, even the Pilot Inspecktors and the Diva Muffins (daughter of Frank Zappa). They add some much needed variety.
Look at Sophia. Twenty-five years ago Sophia was best known as the eldest Golden Girl and now, here she is— the most popular baby name of 2014.
I can’t wait for Mazzy to meet THE SOPHIAS in college.
For the next few weeks, I am partnering with BabyCenter to offer a baby naming service on the Mommy Shorts facebook page. If you are pregnant and need a girl’s name that starts with a “B” or a boy’s name that works with the last name Weiner or you just want to find one name ANY NAME you and your spouse can agree on, give me the details of your naming conundrum. I’ll pick a few of my favorites and crowd source name suggestions. We’ll use BabyCenter’s Most Popular Names of 2014, Baby Names 2014: Winners and Losers and Quirky & Unusual Names for reference. Or, you can also check out the hottest naming trends for 2015.
Uh-oh. Looks like Harlow is on the rise.
CRAP.
Born in 1971, there were 4 “Michele”s that were in my class all through elementary school.way It was always Michele N, Michele C, Michelle G and Michelle L!!!! 2 were spelled the more common way with 2 M’s and 2 of us with just 1. I hated not being able to find novelties with my name spelled my way growing up.. I definitely chose the more traditional route with my kids – Thomas John (whom has always gone by TJ) and Justin Louis. They are now 11 and 8 and we have had a couple Thomas’ and Justin’s in their classes but not too many where they always have to be referred to as Justin F or by their last names… To this day, some of my closest friends still refer to me as Michele (last name) when referring to me!!! Unique is okay but parents definitely need to consider the teasing a kid is going to endure with certain names as well as what their initials spell or how it flows with the last name.. Or, start saving for therapy…
I have the worst name ever I think (Brandi)… Its always the stripper or something in every movie, and lets not forget the song… ugh I get it sung to me allll the time! My girls though, one I thought was more original but just so happened to blow up the year I named her that, which was very sad to me as I wanted original, but failed obviously with Haylee, my 2 yr old is Teegan, which I do get a lot of compliments on and have only heard of a handful since naming her that. Still more then I hoped for.
I grew up with an uncommon name (pronounced soar el) and I’ve always loved it. My mom wanted my name to be unique (middle is Blaine, a family name), and with the exception of two other girls named Sorrel in my home town (what are the chances???), I’ve never met another Sorrel. We chose uncommon but not unusual names for our kids: Gretchen, Gerrit, and Gabriel. Only met one other girl named Gretchen, no other boys with the same spelling for Gerrit (Dutch family name), and there haven’t been any Gabriels in the youngest’s classes yet :).
I don’t get to make a celebrity name since I’m the weirdo with no middle name. 😉
I’m a Michelle from the time when every other child born was either Michael or Michelle. I had one class in high school with 3 other Michelles and a cranky old man teacher than didn’t give a crap to check last names on anything. It was annoying. Needless to say, my kids have uncommon names so they’ll never have that issue. Kyrah (NOT Kira), Ryker (which is actually becoming more popular now) and Kaliya. I love them all.
I have a Ryker too! Its more common then I thought but I still have never met another one.
I love unusual names. I was determined to use a surname or an unusual name for my daughter. I had picked out Emma Lee (cool take on Emily but still too popular for me), Leighton, Kylee, Lennox (loved this but my hubby does HVAC and that’s a very popular brand), and Brooklyn.
We ended up going with Emersyn Taleah. It’s starting to become more popular however. We call her Eme (emmy). Middle name pronounced Ta- leah. Totally fits her but I think Leighton would have too.
I am pregnant with my first girl. I have always said that I would name her “moira” pronounced moy-ra, anytime I mention the name to people the response is discouraging. When people say it they drag out the oy sound and it sounds like a cat in heat got stuck in their throat. I love unique names but I no matter how beautiful I think the name is, if people always butcher it she will grow to hate it. Sooooo I’m looking for suggestions, I like old names and names from fictional characters. One of my biggest problems is our last name really is Crusher and with the wrong first name I feel like it can set you up for some good jokes come middle school.
I also like the idea of uncommon manes. When I was pregnant with my first child, I went on a site that you click a button and it displays random names. Not sure some of them were even names lol I saw BRIELIEGH and feel in love but knew giving my daughter a unique name, I should probably give her an easy spelling , so I went with Brylee Rae. Then my son came and I wanted an Irish name. My sister had an Alexis, so with her and Brylee, I felt a C name would be cute, Cuyler (Kyler) John. 8 years later I became pregnant again and it was another girl (my sister had 2 more but didn’t stick with the pattern) I still wanted unique but I wanted to honor my grandma’s: Aubrey (for my grandma Audrey) Margaret (Maggie when she’s in trouble) Jayne (for my grandma Jane). Recently, I’ve seen a few variations of Brylee, I’ve seen a girl named Kyler and Aubrey’s babysitter is also an Aubrey. My boyfriend has 2 daughters Cadence and Mercaideze (like the car). If we decide to have another one I have no clue on what direction we will take but I assume we are both on bored for some crazy off the wall name!
We gave our four kids unusual names too and I love it! My husband, Ryan, and I always had 4 other Ryan’s and Anne’s in our classrooms growing up so we wanted something original. When we had our boy/girl twins, names Bailyr (our son) and Gracyn (our daughter) back in 2007, it was the first time my mother and mother-in-law agreed on something. They tried to change my son’s name on the birth certificate! And now that they’re in first grade – they both fit their names so well and everyone loves it. Oh and my next two are Wheaton and Paxton, both boys. Unique names are the amazing!! (I love Mazzie too!!)
As one of 2, 3, and even 4 Kims in all my classes every year i say unusual is great
As someone who grew up always having to spell my name. Who had a brother and sister with easy common names who were able to get things at places we visited with their names on it. Who has a weird middle name to go with my first name. I then married a man with a last name that always needs to be spelled. I decided my kids would have first names that were simple, normal, traditional names. Middle names not so much. So my sons names are Benjamin Bodhi & Samuel Kashmir.
Always so fun to hear of another Mazzy. This might be the 4th Mazzy I’ve heard of since naming my daughter. She’s 8 1/2 and I still have no regrets of naming her after a band. 😉
I was thankful that with the last name Smith my mother didn’t name me Jennifer or another popular name during that time and always loved my unique name Kami. My sister name was Kara and my brother was named after my father Kirk. My husband had a dream he was having a “catch” with his son Mahoney, so we went with Mahoney Kirk. In my opinion it was a unique and a strong name.
Brenda is unusual enough to be un-findable in license plate form, but common enough to be a 90210 character. I got the worst of both worlds. My husband wanted our daughter to have a “normal” name but I wanted her name to be the same in Hebrew and English. We ended up naming after our grandmothers. Naomi Beila (pronounced BAYLA). Naomi is a “normal” name but is Hebrew. Beila is Yiddish, I spelled it weird, and yet we know a Beila, a Beylah, and a Bayla. Just don’t call her Nigh-omi.
One thing missing from your post about how you dislike popularity in names is what popular actually means, and how its changed.
Michael was ranked #1 boy’s name in the US from 1960s-1990s, but its actual frequency dropped substantially: from 2/100 in the early 60s to 6/1,000 in the late 90s!
That is, it stayed the most popular name, but much fewer babies got it, because the diversity of all baby names had gotten larger.
To contrast, Sophia recently had a peak at about 5/1,000 and Sofia at 2/1,000.
So, even with the most popular names of the past few years, its not likely to ever compare with the number of Michaels found in past generations. I doubt your child will attend school with “the Soph(f)ias” the way your husband did with “the Michaels”.
After having to repeat my name to everyone at least 3 time before they understood, I shortened Mary Devan to just Devan(pronounced like the boys name Devon and that’s just my first name). Growing up with 4 names was different but now I think it’s pretty cool. My husband and I have kids names picked out that are different but easily pronounced. Rylan Grace , Dillon James(not original but his name is dillon and we have james on both sides) and Trasyn Elizabeth(my middle name)/Cooper for a boy middle name. We can’t wait to have kids and don’t care if people like theit names or not
I was given my grandma’s name, Barbara Ann, with the nickname of Barbie, which at 22 I am still trying to out grow, I just can’t some family to let go of it, because she passed away three months before I was born. If I had been given the first name my mom chose i would have been September Dawn with the nickname of Temie (tem me). I was the fifth generation on mom side to get her grandma name.
My sister was given Serena and my brother was given Dakota. My little sister is named after Samantha cousin from Bewitched,everyone gave my mom trouble about it but it so fits her now. We were always asked if my brother was named after the state or the truck but no he was named after an Indian tribe.
When it came to naming my son I made sure his name was common but unique, I purposeful avoided family names and names that reminded me of someone I knew and then settled on a name that my husband and I liked. In the end we settled on Tyler Anthony. He has a variety of nicknames that the family calls him but he won’t have a nickname based on Tyler because I refuse to let Ty stick.