Yesterday marked the last day of the Evil Baby Glare-off, and in keeping with a tradition started last year, today will be a day of cleansing. Let us wash away all those evil thoughts of demonic children trying to eat us in our sleep by taking a gander at my adorable child watching television.
Don't you feel better now?
Not yet? If you're still feeling the residual effects of demon spawn, allow me to recount a few of Mazzy's more adorable moments…
First, there was the time I asked Mazzy if she would like to go into the big pool or the little pool. She said, "The big pool. The little pool is for cats." It took me a moment before I realized— Mazzy was confusing "kiddie" with "kitty".
Then there was the time I told Mazzy I was going to the doctor.
MAZZY: I go to the doctor too.
ME: Yes, but this doctor is for mommies.
MAZZY: My doctor is for Mazzies.
Or the day, Mike taught Mazzy the "thumbs up" sign…
Later that evening, Mazzy started complaining about going out to eat. So I said, "If you are good at the restaurant, then you can have ice cream after." Mazzy turned to me, both thumbs extended, and said, "Thumbs up, Mommy! Thumbs up!"
Here's another memorable moment involving eating out…
We had just finished dinner at a nearby restaurant, when we found out they didn't take credit cards. Mike and Mazzy went back to the apartment to get cash, while I stayed put. When they finally got back, Mazzy ran toward me, screaming at the top of her lungs so that every other patron could hear, "MOM! I'VE GOT THE MONEY!!!!"
Or how about the morning Mike walked out of our bedroom wearing a striped rugby shirt?
Mazzy took one look at him, said he looked like Steve from Blue's Clues and then, without a word, Mike turned around, went back in the bedroom and CHANGED.
And then there was the time, I asked Mazzy if she had ants in her pants. She lifted her dress, picked a tiny black ball of fuzz off her tights and asked incredulously, "Is this an ANT?"
But this last one is my favorite.
A relative gave Mazzy a huge stack of old children's books. One of the books is titled Owen with a picture of a mouse on the cover. It looks totally harmless but every time I pick it up to read to her, Mazzy says "NO. THAT'S A TERRIBLE BOOK," before grabbing it from my hands and throwing it across the room.
This happened three or four times and I had no idea why she was so against it, until I told my mom the story.
My mom smiled. "Oh," she said, "I read it to her once. You should read it."
So I picked up the rejected book and gave it a perusal. You know what it's about?
It's about a little mouse who carries his blankie everywhere and his busybody neighbor makes suggestions to his parents about how they can effectively get rid of it— like soaking the blankie in vinegar so it will start to smell. Finally, Owen starts school and the school doesn't allow him to bring his blankie, so his mother decides to cut the blankie into tiny pieces so Owen can hide the bits in his backpack.
Mazzy's blankie, affectionately called "BOO", has been her most prized posession since birth, so I guess I can understand why she didn't want me getting any ideas.
Is the cleanse working? Are you over the evil babies yet?
Okay. Here's my last and final cuteness offering…
Mazzy putting her head all the way back in the bath for the first time:
If that didn't work, I've lost you forever.
What's the cutest thing your kid has done lately?
The Evil Baby Glare-Off was featured on MSN last night but they credited mommypants.com instead of mommyshorts.com. That's a whole different clothing item! I have no idea how to contact them so if you are on twitter, please help a girl out by tweeting:
Please RT @msnNOW Evil babies should be credited to Mommyshorts.com, not mommypants. http://on-msn.com/Tv0vl0 @mommyshorts
Update: The Glare-Off was also on the Today Show this morning, but also credited to Mommy Pants. Blerg.
Update to the Update: Thanks to all your tweets, MSN is now corrected! And the Today Show obviously can't change what came out of Al Roker's mouth, but they did put the correct credit underneath the online video. Click here to see the clip.