Yesterday, I sat in my office saying things like, “which one is worse— a burger in the floor vent or a bag of salad exploding in the trunk?” and “is an old cat with a bowel disorder funny gross? or just gross gross?”
It was hard narrowing down your most horrible and most hilarious smells to ten. It’s always hard. You guys are too witty! Sometimes I’m not sure why I still write this blog when I should just be outsourcing to my readers.
Also, I was expecting Method to swoop in and say things like, “you absolutely cannot use the farting hotbox headline” or “stray cat sex is way too OFF BRAND” but they have done no such thing. They think you all are as funny as I do. And I guess stray cat sex is TOTALLY ON BRAND!
That being said, stray cat sex got nixed for a family who loves asparagus. It was a tough choice!
Also getting the axe was “singed hair,” “lactose intolerance,” and “kimchee culinary failures”. Although, if someone thought to put them all together, you’d have a winner. I bet the Fresh Clover air refresher would never have to work so hard again in its life!
Without further ado, here are my top ten finalists for the Method Air Refreshers headline contest:
Please vote for your favorite! You can vote once a day until the winner is announced on September 17th.
The grand prize winner will receive an $1,000 Target gift card and a year supply of Method Air Refreshers. Plus, the nine remaining finalists will get a $50 Target gift card and the complete line of Method Air Refreshers.
Like all Method products, Method’s new air refreshers are safe for people, pets and the planet. They are designed with revolutionary pressurized air technology, which means unlike most traditional aerosol sprays (which are powered by petroleum-based propellant mixed in with the product), they are powered by PURE AIR. When you spray, you fill your room with one of Method’s five vibrant all-natural scents. No CFCs (those are the things that destroy the ozone). No dirty propellants.
And hopefully that moldy burger, wet dog, cat pee, gym sneaker, clogged toilet stench is a thing of the past.
Until your mother-in-law farts, of course.
This post was sponsored by Method but the horrible household smells are all yours.
I love the “Essence of Puberty!” That said, I did think of this contest at 3 am. I was feeding the baby and he starts farting. Then, my sleeping husband starts farting. Baby farts again. In my mind, “they are having a sleeping farting contest just like the mommyshorts slogan.”
I looooooove Method. And I live at Target. Why did I forget to enter this contest???
Well, since I forgot, I am rooting for Janel. JANEL FOR THE WIN!!!!
Method will like this…your posts about this new product made me seek it out and I bought 2 different scents. And I NEVER buy air freshener ever. And I love it. 🙂
These are all so funny but I’m shocked that none mention the horrible smell of baby spitup.
Sooooooo funny!!! Sadly I can identify with so many of them.
i love the gross burger one.
Janel had me at “smelling like ….disappointment”
God I wish I had more time at work to read your blog every day! The finalists had us cracking up but as an office, we could’ve submitted, “We wished our office smelled less like Old man who hasn’t showered in a week and more like Clover”.
Ahhhh!! I’m so thankful to Jen Mann for linking to this on the facebook…I had no idea I made the finals. For once, my sad habit of catching up on blog-reading while drinking gin and tonics might pay off.
Thanks a bunch for allowing my divorce stench to permeate this list of funny.
Am I a finalist? I see a shortened version of my ‘Essence Of Puberty’ but don’t know if it is still mine lol? I think the “burnt cookies and disappointment” is pretty cute 🙂
BTW with 7 children, 6 of them boys, I could REALLY use some air freshener lol!
It’s you! I shortened a few to fit the template.
Jessica got my vote. I know that grown-man-dump-diaper-genie smell all to well.
I piggyback JD and go for JANEL!!!!!! Disappointment! Bwahahahaha!