Wit Archives - Mommy Shorts

11/22/22

The Ultimate Holiday Gift Guide With Ideas for Everyone You Know in 2022!

Whatever holiday you celebrate and whoever you are shopping for, you are guaranteed to find a great gift idea in this crazy extensive guide!

01/31/20

That Time Mazzy Was Asked to Brag About Herself

In the hallway of Mazzy’s school, student projects often hang outside the classroom. When Mazzy’s work is on the wall, I can’t help but compare hers to the other kids in the class.

03/06/19

Explaining the Tricky World of Text Messages to my 9yo

The problem started over Christmas when Mike bought two new iPads for everyone to use. You see, before then, Mazzy and Harlow had been using our old iPads, which were first generation iPads.

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03/21/16

16 Times Parents Needed to Up their Child Proofing Game

Kids seem to go from rolling over to crawling to scaling the walls in a blink of an eye. As a result, every parent has a moment when they find their child somewhere they least expected.

01/14/16

Laughing at the Unlaughable

Sometimes the things that make you laugh the hardest are the things you are not supposed to laugh about at all. Like your kid falling.

01/11/16

Winter Break Screwed Up Our Morning Routine

For the past six years, my kids have woken me up earlier than I wanted or needed to get up, which I thought was a bad thing. But now I know needing to wake your kids up is way worse.

01/05/16

7yo Claims “School Company” Extends Winter “Brake”

7yo Cara Grimard is no dope. Knowing her Christmas break was ending soon, she presented this VERY official school document to her dad.

09/08/15

13 Reasons to be Happy Your Babies have Graduated to Big Kids

At some point, it’s time to say goodbye to the baby phase. But never fear, because there’s lots of great stuff coming! In fact, your life as a Big Kid Parent is about to improve tremendously.

05/12/15

25 “Facts” Moms Found Out About Themselves on Mother’s Day

If your kid brought home an “All About Mom” questionnaire from school, chances are it contained a few hilarious half-truths his teacher is still laughing about in the teacher’s lounge.

04/09/15

What Your Child’s After School Activities Say About You

Are you hoping your child will become the next great artist or an Olympic champion? Or do you just want him to stop clobbering you with a lightsaber?

02/13/15

The Stages of Parenthood as Told By Your Laundry

Parents do a TON of laundry. Besides professional mud wrestlers and the people who clean up elephant crap at the circus, I’m willing to bet parents do more laundry than anyone else on earth.

02/11/15

Packing Up the Kids for the Coldest Weekend of Our Lives

Mike and I are taking the kids for a ski trip this weekend, where the weather will be zero degrees, feels like negative eleven. Sounds a little like Arendelle. Brrrrrrrr.

09/08/14

Get Out of My Bed, Please

Photo Contest: Serta Mattress with Adjustable Foundation ($5000) Shortly after Mazzy transitioned from her crib to her toddler bed, she had an ...

09/05/14

36 Kids Who Were Less Than Enthused About Their First Day of School

After I published the many many pics it took to get Mazzy’s perfect “first day of kindergarten” photo, I asked fans of my facebook ...

08/27/14

Profanity for Parents

I came *this close* to screaming "SHIT!" when my family poured a bucket of ice water on me, so I am in no place to judge the two-year-old ...