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Grammy and I took Mazzy to see the Lion King on Sunday. It was her first Broadway Show. Wondering if a four-year-old is old enough for a three hour stage performance? Here’s what I can tell you about the experience…

1) Mazzy hit her knee on the car door before we went into the theater and despite no bleeding whatsoever, insisted on a band aid. I did not have a band aid. I don’t know what I was thinking leaving the house without a wide variety of character-themed bandage options. For the next twenty minutes leading up to the show (going into the theater, using the bathroom, finding our seats, etc.), she complained so much about needing a band aid, I threatened to leave. Minutes before the curtain went up, an angel sent down from God (aka the woman in front of us) turned around to offer Mazzy one of her band aids. It was a plain band aid and I had this moment of panic when I was sure Mazzy would break down in tears just as “The Circle of Life” started. But instead she said, “It’s okay that it’s plain Mom. I will wear it anyway!” I guess she is growing up?

2) Mazzy got through the first act fine and really enjoyed it. The opening number in particular blew her away. Three minutes into the second act, she shouted, “WHEN IS THIS GOING TO BE OVER???” We were sitting in the balcony. Pretty sure she was loud enough for the actors to hear her up on stage.

3) My mother bought Mazzy a dixie cup of ice cream at the concession stand during intermission. I don’t know if I have ever seen anyone eating ice cream during a Broadway show, and since Mazzy didn’t ask for it, this ranks up there with one of the most unnecessary indulgences of all time. It’s like George Costanza eating a sandwich during sex. I swear, we could be on the moon and somehow Grammy would produce a soft serve cone with rainbow sprinkles to further solidify her place as Mazzy’s favorite person.

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4) Mazzy was sitting on my lap for the entire show because she couldn’t see (even with the provided booster seat). This meant she dripped ice cream all over me throughout the second act.

5) Despite Grammy making up some cockamamie story about Simba’s dad falling down and recuperating in the hospital, Mazzy totally understood that Mufasa died.┬áBut she also said she didn’t think the Lion King was sad, so now I think she might be a sociopath.

6) On the way out, Mazzy spotted the gift shop and asked if she could have a toy. Grammy said, “Which one do you want?” Mazzy thought really hard and decided on Nala. We all agreed that was an excellent choice. Then Mazzy said, “But if I pick one of the smaller toys, can I have two?” Grammy replied without hesitation, “Yes.” I informed Grammy gently that the small toys were $20 a piece, thinking she would be forced to let Mazzy down. Nope! Grammy was fine with it. This is the same woman who bought me a clock pen for my 12th birthday and made me pay for my own clothes in high school.

7) After the show, we met up with a friend of hers at the playground. He asked her if she liked the show. She said, “Yes! I got ice cream and two toys!”

8) When we got home, Mazzy said we needed to switch her plain band aid for a character band aid. Then she removed the plain band aid, went through the excrutiatingly long process of selecting the perfect Lightening McQueen band aid, and then stared at both of her knees for a solid minute before asking, “Mom, do you remember where my band aid went?”

The end.

Thank you Grammy, for being the best Grammy ever.*

*Grandmas and Grammies are a totally separate category. Grandma Toby (aka my mother-in-law) is the best Grandma ever too.